The Final Journey: Destination Jacksonville

SUMMIT-Sunday-Afternoon/Evening

2008-05-30T21:57:00.003-05:00

After games were finished we all loaded back on the bus and headed back to the hotel. On the way back we stopped at Taco Bell and ate quickly. When we got back to the hotel, I ran upstairs and grabbed my copy of the reading that Taylor and I were doing at closing ceremonies, then ran back downstairs to do a sound check. Taylor and I ran through it once. Then I ran back upstairs and jumped in the shower. After finishing the shower, getting dressed, doing a quick redo of my makeup and putting some mousse in my hair so it would look somewhat decent despite being wet, Rebecca and I went downstairs for the platinum round of Bible quiz. I though they already started when we got down there, so I was very surprised to hear a girl going "Wait, don't tell me, I know this!" All I'm thinking is "What the heck? What kind of attitude problem does this girl have?" Then she proceeds "Jesus, God, the Bible, and Moses". Then it dawns on me "Oh, this must only be the practice question!" Sure enough it was. It went on to the second person. The full question said since we just celebrated Art's 90th birthday (or something like that...), how many years has Art been married to his wife? The second person stands up and says "90 years". It was funny. The real answer was 67. Wow. During platinum round I kept thinking how my team would have fit in there so easily...but it's okay. Every time someone answered a question I was answering the question right along with them in my head...and whenever someone got something wrong I got so frustrated, I couldn't stop thinking you should know this! The worst was when one person got up, said the distinctives of Paul's message PERFECTLY, then said that was not his answer and started over! I was so frustrated for that person (I didn't realize until later that it was Ricki's church, Taylor Creek). Arielle had to remind me not to make faces and physically react, lest the competitors notice from up on stage. But overall I felt platinum round was good, the points seemed to be evenly spread out, not one or two teams dominating every question.

After platinum round, they announced the winners of the fine arts categories. As they were going through the different categories I noticed that one of the big cardboard checks had something written on the back. I strained to see what it said, and although I couldn't make it out clearly I was pretty sure it said "Adam Hardy". I poked Jonathan (or was it Ben?) in the side and asked if he thought that's what it said, and he confirmed that yes, he too was pretty sure it said Adam Hardy. That made me happy, I had hoped that if I didn't win public speaking, that Adam would win. He's a really, really good speaker (not to mention a very good friend!). Then they get to public speaking, and they announce that there are two winners (I'm pretty sure one is the teens/adult category and the other is the children's category). The guy announcing said "The first one is from Texas..." (In my mind: "Yep, Adam Hardy") "From Grace Covenant Church..." ("Wait, what the...") "...Shaney Lee!" OH MY GOSH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! I WAS SOOOOOO EXCITED!!!!!!!!!! And surprised, too! Brian asked me later why I was surprised, "We all knew you won." Well, I didn't. I thought Adam had won. But it turns out the he got second in the teens/adult category, right behind me. The other girl who won the children's category was a girl named Nicole from Colorado. The winner of the piano competition was Matthew Swift, the guy who played piano during citation ceremony and is going to Baylor. Other than that, I don't remember who won what.

After they announced the fine arts winners, there was a break before closing ceremonies, so I took the laptop to the lobby to do the online check-in for my family's fight the next day. After doing that, Jonathan came up to me and asked me to check the results from speech and debate regionals so he could see if he and Ben would get a debate at-large slot to nationals. They didn't, unfortunately. But I DID see that Charity and Toni qualified in LD! I was sooooo happy! Then I went back upstairs for closing ceremonies. Mrs. Bickham caught me outside the door and said "Adam says congratulations." "Oh, you called him and told him already?" I asked. "Well, he got second, and I called to tell him that," she replied. I was very happy for Adam! She then proceeded to say that after being told that he got second, Adam asked "So who got first?" When Mrs. Bickham answered "Shaney", Adam's reaction was "Oh, that is so stinkin' awesome!" Hahaha...classic Adam Hardy.

Then closing ceremonies started. I went to the back of the room, got my mic, then headed up onstage as the highlight video was playing. After the highlight video finished, Taylor and I did our reading. My voice was starting to give out from all the screaming I had done that day, but as I was reading all I was thinking was "You just won public speaking, you have to do this well!" I used much vocal variety and inflection as I possibly could. Later, my mom told me "I never realized your voice was so smooth and pleasant to listen to!" Well, it's not normally, I just made sure to use my voice well during the reading! :P After I got offstage was worship. It was AMAZING!!!! WOW!!!! There was also a guy who did "sand art" which was really cool. I honestly don't remember much about closing ceremonies beyond that-but I do know that God was there. At the end, they showed the video announcing next year's Summit location-Greensborough, North Carolina!

After closing ceremonies, Altobelli called one last team meeting to share our highs and lows of Summit. I don't remember exactly everything I said, I remember saying that kissing Art Rorheim was a high, and that one low was that Summit was OVER!!! We also revealed our "secret prayer partners". Rachel Wohl had been praying for me, and I had been praying for Altobelli.

After our team meeting I got to talk with Ricki a bit and met "Mr. Blue Shirt". Then we went out to dinner at the American Cafe.

As I was getting ready for bed that night, we heard a knock on our door. I opened it, and Altobelli was standing there WITH MY BAG THAT HAD BEEN MISSING SINCE FRIDAY NIGHT!!!!! I was SOOOOOOOO ecstatic to have it back!!! I asked him "Where was it?" "Probably where you left it". "But I didn't leave it anywhere! WHERE WAS IT?" "Downstairs in the ballroom. Kevin White found it as they were cleaning up and called the last number dialed, which happened to be mine."

So I finally had my money, cell phone, Bible, etc. back!!!

At midnight, after we were already asleep, Paul Hastings called to see how things were going. I stayed up for about a half hour or so talking to him and Christina. When I mentioned that no one else was still up, Paul's reaction was "What kind of Summit is that???" But he understood when I explained that our bus left at 6:30 am the next morning.

SUMMIT-Sunday-Games!

2008-05-20T01:56:00.002-05:00

Sunday morning I wake up, thanks to staying up late the night before talking to Arielle I am pretty exhausted...but I force myself to get out of bed and get ready to go. We stop by Einstein's Bagels before loading on the bus and driving to the University of Northern Florida. When we get there and get on the circle, Marcelo reads the real final roster of who's doing what event. I am in four events the first round, and two every round after that. I wasn't happy that I was taken out of both team basketball and balloon, but it's what I was expecting after talking with Arielle the night before, so I was okay with it. Plus, it was a huge improvement over what I though I had been assigned the day before.

So round one. We get second on the circle, losing to Team New England #2. This was mostly due to the fact that we pretty much only practiced playoff events, so our other events were a little weak. But oh well. I'm still happy with the first round, because ROSE AND I WON THE THREE-LEGGED RACE!!!! Oh my goodness you have NO idea how happy that makes me!!!! Three-legged race has always been my favorite event since T&T, and to win my favorite event at Summit, the last time I would ever compete in that event, was simply the coolest thing ever!!!!! Girl's tug wasn't that great. I don't know what it is but TNE for some reason is really good at tug...even though they don't always have the biggest girls and there form doesn't look all that great. We actually had to restart tug because TNE started tugging before they blew the horn, only Rebecca didn't realize that TNE had false started so she started pulling...everybody on our line is yelling at Rebecca to stop pulling but she doesn't hear them, so I had to turn around and get in Rebecca's face and tell her to stop pulling! So yeah, we restarted, and TNE won, though we put up a fight and held them off for a little bit. Also, I'm pretty sure it was the first round that Ben got his funny handoff.

So they were running the sprint relay. Rachel ran her two laps and caught up to the girl in front of her. Ben sees Rachel coming around, so he starts to take off. The girl on the OTHER team speeds up, gets a couple steps ahead of Rachel, and puts her baton in Ben's hand! Rachel had no clue what to do, Ben took a couple of steps before realizing he had the wrong baton in his hand and stopped, having no clue what to do, and the guy on the other team stood there looking baffled, having no clue what to do! All of us on the line were laughing so hard...IT WAS SO HILARIOUS!!!!! The best part is that Daniel caught it on tape!!! Oh my gosh it was SO FUNNY!!!!

So yeah, first round we get second on our circle. We go on to round two where we get first. Tug was a lot of fun that round, it was REALLY close. I actually thought that the other team had won and was upset when they blew the whistle. Then I hear my team screaming and cheering behind us...so I turn around and Rebecca has the beanbag, and it hits me that WE WON!!! Haha I was so excited!!!

We go outside to eat lunch. But let's back up a little bit. To Summit 2006 in Chicago, actually. Marcelo saw a cute girl on his circle, and Brian told him that when he won the marathon race he should go up to her and say "That was for you!" Problem is, he DQs when he knocks down the first pin. So yeah, he doesn't get to do it, but he goes up to the girl afterwards (I think...Marcelo can correct me if I'm wrong) and tells her what he had been planning to do. Fast forward to 2008. In our first round, there had been a girl named Tana on a different flight on our circle. She was cute and fast, breaking both the agility and sprint race records. Marcelo went up to her after his agility (?) and told her "That was for you". So during the lunch break, Marcelo sees the girl from 2006 with Tana's church. Marcelo is weirded out and tells Brian that the two girls are from the same church. Brian goes over to talk to the girls, runs back to get Marcelo, drags him over to the girls, and announces to Marcelo, "They're sisters, you idiot!" I laughed SO HARD when I heard about that!!! Out of all the possible girls at Summit...from two different years! What a coincidence...

Anyways, we go back into the gym. We win round three. Nothing particularly special that I remember.

Round 4, we're on the circle where Taylor's timing. Apparently we were 1 second off the marathon medley record and could have broken it if Brian had run faster and not decided to try and conserve energy. We win round 4 as well.

So rounds 1-4 were beautiful. Round 5, not so much. We started out DQing sprint race, and had at least one more DQ (on balloon I think...). Still, we put up a REALLY good fight, missing first place on our circle and going on to gold round by two points. But it's alright, because we did better than I was expecting (I expected to get to bronze round, round 4, and then drop out). This is MUCH farther than any other team in Grace Covenant history has ever gone. Unfortunately, when the round was over we weren't thinking that, because the line judges DQed us on boy's tug even though we thought they were wrong...so Everett challenged it but the line judge's wouldn't change. Had we not been DQed in that event we would have gone on. So we're all slipping into a bad mood, when the circle director comes up to us and says that DQing all three teams was the best they could possibly do based on what they saw. He then went on to say he needed prayer because his wife had died twelve weeks beforehand! I felt SO guilty when he said that, but I was also amazed that he was even there! We all put our hands on him, and Everett prayed...in that moment, I felt overwhelmed by what God was showing me. How could I possibly be complaining about a silver round finish, when others were going through such difficult circumstances? I felt so many emotions in that moment...grief for the circle director, awe at the Christian fellowship, joy for God's obvious hand on our team that day, happiness at our finish, anger at myself for getting angry at the line judges, sadness that I was done, my last year of Summit EVER was over...I started bawling. No joke. I was overwhelmed by everything. And I wasn't the only one crying, I saw several other girls crying. Then the hugs started going around...there was a sense of finalty in those moments that I really can't describe. That was it. MY YEARS OF SUMMIT COMPETITION WERE OVER. And I didn't know what to do in that moment. So I just clung to my teammates. Hugs must be God's way of giving His comfort in a tangible way. I was incredibly overwhelmed in that moment, but if I was hugging a teammate, everything was okay.

Finally we watched the gold round. The team we lost to got second, team new england #1 got first. I FINALLY GOT TO MEET NEWENGLANDITE08 FROM THE AWANA FORUMS!!!!! I've been meaning to meet him at Summit for the past three years. No joke. Ever since Chicago year. And I FINALLY got to!!

Games were amazing. Even after getting pulled out of several of the events I wanted to do I still had an amazing time. God was so evident that day. And, believe it or not, that day I fell in love with the one event I've always hated the most. That's right. I fell in love with tug. Too bad I fell in love with it the LAST TIME I would ever compete in it!!!! Urgh...

SUMMIT-Saturday-Afternoon & Evening

2008-05-13T22:49:00.004-05:00

Okay...*Deep Breath*...this is the post I have been dreading writing. I was in a bad mood all of Saturday afternoon and evening. Just as a disclaimer, this is all how I felt about the events as they were going on, not necessarily how I feel about them now.

So after Rachel Wohl's fine arts performance, we decide we are going to practice games with Alex and then go to the beach. So we all get changed into our games clothes and go find a place to practice. At the beginning of the practice, we all sit down and Marcelo reads off what I'm led to believe is the final set-up for who's playing what the next day. We all knew that somebody was going to get shafted for Alex since she's a really good athlete, but as Marcelo's reading off the list I'm keeping track of how many events Alex has in addition to how many events I had. To give you some perspective, before Alex came into the picture, I was in five events, three of which were playoff events. When Marcelo is finished reading, I am in three events in round one and ZERO events in the remainder of the rounds. Alex is in SIX events, FOUR of which are playoff events. I was FURIOUS. I put in hours upon hours of practice and working out for these games, starting way back in October. Alex, on the other hand, while being very active and involved in a lot of sports, had not practiced with us one single time before this. Not only that, but she has two more years after this. How many do I have? ZERO! I AM A SENIOR!!! Could they not have shafted one of the other girls, or try spreading out the shafting instead of only having one person step out? Honestly, the only language that could describe how I felt at that moment is language I refuse to use. But I'm not going to let anyone know I'm upset...no siree, because games doesn't matter in the big scheme of things and God has a bigger plan and...oh, what the heck, who am I kidding? I leave the practice and find a restroom and cry for a little while, because yes, I am very upset...but I know that if I leave for too long, people will know something's up. So I force myself to stop crying and head back to the practice. So they only practice balloon and basketball, two events that I'm no longer in, so I'm just sitting there. You know how hard it is to keep your emotions hidden when you're just sitting there? Basically impossible. Rachel Wohl notices I'm not happy and makes me promise that I will talk to her later. I wanted to talk to someone, anyone, right then...but they were all practicing, so I couldn't. FINALLY the practice ends, we eat lunch (pizza), then go back up to the rooms to change to go to the beach. I had lost my sunglasses so Mrs. Wohl takes me down to the gift shop to get a pair before we leave.

So we go to the beach. Everyone else had a fun time, but I didn't. I hated pretty much every minute we were there. I was in a very bad mood, and I knew it, but I also had no desire to even try to change my attitude. What I wanted to do what to swim and jump waves in the ocean, take the emotions I was feeling and channel it into the energy it would take to move around in the waves...but my knee wound from the night before was still bothering me, and as soon as I attempted to go knee deep in the ocean, the saltwater stung the wound really, really bad. So I just went back up to the sand. Rachel Barnett buried me in the sand and made me a mermaid...that was fun and helped take my mind off of games a little bit. We also threw around the frisbee a little, which was fun. Then we tried to play an actual game of ultimate...not so fun.

After the beach we go eat dinner at Joe's Crab Shack. I hadn't brought a towel, the sun was setting, we were sitting outside in the shade, and the wind was blowing. I WAS FREEZING COLD!!!! I think I just spent most of dinner shivering and trying not to get hypothermia. Dinner was good, but dessert was AMAZING...chocolate cake and banana crepes. YUM!

We were supposed to have devotions on the beach after dinner, but several of us were just way too cold, so we went back to the hotel. On the way back, Everett kept teasing me by touching my knee around the wound. Every time his hand would reach out, I always reacted, eventhough I knew he wasn't going to actually touch the wound. When we got back to the hotel, Everett gets of the bus right in front of me. I'm on the steps right above him, I pause to tell someone something, and then Everett goes for my knee once again...I see it out of the corner of my eye and react by turning TOWARDS him...so he hits me right in the wound. IT HURT SOOOOOO BAD...for about ten seconds. After that it didn't actually hurt anymore, but the tears that had sprung to my eyes from the sudden pain were still rolling down my cheeks. Anyways, we get up to the fifth floor, and Altobelli tells us all to take showers and then come back to the boy's room for devotions. So we go to take our showers. I take mine first, and after I finished and was waiting for the other girls in my room to take their showers, I heard a knock on the door. On the other side of that door was the one bright spot in my day, the one thing that made me happy in a time period of depression. I opened the door and saw Altobelli, and he pointed to someone and said "It's his fault". I looked around the doorpost to see who "he" was, and Adam Hardy was standing there! Red hair, big smile and all! I gave him a hug, and then he told me he was leaving that night and had come by to say good-bye. "Well then, when you win public speaking tomorrow, I'll go accept your award for you!" I said. "Well, you'll probably have to fight my coach for it," he replied. We chatted for about a minute longer, then he said "Well, I guess I'll see you around...sometime. Maybe not for awhile. Maybe not even on this side of paradise!" I knew what he was getting at. We see eachother at AWANA events and debate tournaments, both things that were ending for us since we were seniors. But I quickly correct him and told him that I would see him much sooner than that. "I'll definitely come up and see you at Howard Payne. I still owe Tabitha a visit."

So when the team gathers back together, Altobelli decides to go around and have us all say our high and low point for the day. People start talking...pretty much everyone was talking about how the beach was such a great high, and how the team had seemed really unified that day and basically going on and on about how the whole day was such a high...as we keep going around the room I am only getting more and more depressed. And I thought I was ALREADY in a bad mood. When it gets to me, I just say to skip me. And so it continues...more and more highs, and almost no lows. In fact the ONLY low I can remember is Everett's which was hitting me in the knee...only he was LAUGHING as he said it! I finally got to the point where I believed that he really was sorry...two days later. But that's later. Right NOW, I was only getting more and more upset as more and more people were going on and on about how great the day was. So finally pretty much everyone's gone except me. I have absolutely NO CLUE what I said my high was, it probably was something about fine arts...but then it gets to my low. And as much as I really, really, really don't want to talk about it, I can't lie either...so I just say that I had a low but I would really rather not talk about it. Then Rachel Barnett says "Shaney, we all pretty much know it's about games, right?" Oh. My. Gosh. I JUST SAID I DIDN'T WANT TO TALK ABOUT IT!!!!!! CAN'T YOU RESPECT THAT!?????? Oh my word I was sooooooooooooooo ticked at Rachel for that. But that got eclipsed in what happened next. Altobelli said, "Actually, I had wanted to talk about that..." but I cut him off. I looked at him and said as clearly as I could, "Please DO NOT talk about this. I really DO NOT want you to talk about this. Because I am still upset about it, and if you do talk about it I am going to cry right here in front of everybody and I REALLY do not want to do that!" So Altobelli says something along the lines of "Okay, I understand, but I really think this needs to be said..." and then proceeds to talk for what feels like forever about how God gave different people different gifts and that applies to games and such (which, as a side note, wasn't really the point and why I was upset)...and, just I said, I started to cry in front of EVERYONE!!!!! WHAT THE FREAKIN' HECK???? DO YOU REALLY NOT UNDERSTAND WHAT THE WORDS "DO NOT TALK ABOUT IT" MEAN????? WHY DO YOU HAVE TO DO EXACTLY WHAT I TOLD YOU NOT TO DO??????!!!!!! Oh. My. Gosh. Words don't even begin to describe just how FURIOUS I was with Altobelli. I don't even remember what happened for the rest of the meeting. And, in all honesty, I was too furious to care.

But I did manage to force myself to stop crying. But I knew I had a lot more tears to get out. So once the meeting is over, I head back to the room with my roommates, then tell them "I'm going out of the room for a little bit, I don't have a key so don't close the door." Then I start moving down the hallway, looking for a good place to be alone. I knew exactly what I was looking for: The stairwell. I didn't know where it was, but I knew it had to be somewhere. Finally, I found it. The door to the stairwell. So I went into the stairwell. There happened to be a big window seat right in front of a window overlooking the river. So I curled up in the corner of the windowseat. And finally, finally, after being upset all day and wanting some time alone but never getting it, I just let my tears flow. I was bawling. Sure, I've been upset and angry in the past, but I seriously cannot remember the last time I was so furious with MULTIPLE friends. I tried to pray, I started to ask God to change my attitude and help me to focus on the eternal, not the temporal, but I was crying too hard to focus. I really don't know how long I cried, I just know that I cried long enough that finally I couldn't cry any longer, even though there were still tears that I could feel that needed to be shed. Finally, I was just sitting there, looking out beyond the river. I had no watch on, had not bothered to check the time before I left, and had absolutely no clue whatsoever how long I had been gone. All I knew is that it felt like a long time...but I still didn't want to go back. There were still enough tears left that the smallest thing, even seeing the face of one of my teammates, could potentially set off another flood of tears...but finally I decided I had to go back, lest I cause the rest of my team to worry. So I walk out the door into the hallway, and the first thing I see is Rachel B. and Altobelli talking to each other. No way am I dealing with seeing both of them. So I run back into the stairwell before either of them sees me. I wait for another two to five minutes, then try again...as soon as I walk the door, Rose GRABS me and starts talking at a million miles a minute..."Omigosh, Shaney, where have you been???" And then proceeded to say a million and one other things that I didn't really understand...Rose is talking as we're walking down the hall, finally I make it back to my room. Rebecca is the first one I see when I walk in, she gives me a hug...and I start crying all over again. Rachel Wohl is on the phone, but as soon as she gets off she comes over and gives me a hug...finally she says, "Do you want to talk?" I said that YES, I did want to talk, but not there...so I take Rachel with me back to the stairwell and spill out my frustrations with games. She listened, which was nice, but even after venting everything I still wasn't okay like I thought I would be...I know I need to talk to an adult. Altobelli is out. There is nooooooo way I am talking to him at that point. Everett...well, I could talk to him, but I didn't think he'd be able to deal with the fact that I was crying. So I ask Rachel to go get her mom. Mrs. Wohl comes in and hears me tell the whole story over again. She was soooo helpful, she started asking all sorts of questions that helped me think through what I needed to do next. Finally, she and I both agreed that I needed to talk to Arielle that night. So I go out, knock on the door of the other girl's room, and ask to talk to Arielle. And I am so glad I did. She is such a sweet girl, and she was blatantly honest with me. Turns out she and Marcelo had made several possible lists, and the one that he had read was the one that put Alex in as much as possible, but they had other possibilities lined up. They had just used that lineup for practice since Alex hadn't practiced with the team before. Arielle told me about several of the other possibilities and why they would or wouldn't use them. She didn't tell me for certain what the lineup would be, but she was honest with me about what was likely to happen. She also explained a lot of the reasoning behind certain lineups, which, while I didn't agree with everything, still made a lot of sense. I was so glad I talked to her. She and I actually ended up talking about a couple other things not completely related to games, just mostly "girl talk"...all of a sudden, I hear a door slam. I look down the hall and I see Brian and Marcelo walking towards us. I hear Brian exclaim "Shaney's back?!?!?" and Arielle replies "yeah, she's been back for awhile". Apparently I had been gone long enough that everybody knew I was missing and people had gone searching for me. Yikes. I'm not sure why but for some reason, despite not being in a particularly bad mood anymore I still had no desire to see any of the guys. So I jump up as fast as I can and run into my room. Arielle shoos the boys away and then calls to me, "It's alright Shaney, they're gone". So I come back out and we talk a little bit longer. In the end, although I still wasn't 100% happy with the decisions made about the lineup, the fact that Arielle was willing to talk to me about it and be completely honest with me about what she was thinking made it a whole lot easier for me to accept the final lineup when it was read the next day.

So yeah, that was my horrible day at Summit. Looking back, I feel like a complete jerk for just letting myself be in a bad mood that day and cause myself not to enjoy the beach because of my awful attitude. I was also a jerk for running away and getting everybody all worried. The sad part was, I could have prevented it by talking to Arielle earlier in the day instead of waiting until late at night. Yeah, I blew it that day.

SUMMIT-Saturday-Fine Arts

2008-05-11T13:20:00.002-05:00

Saturday morning was fine arts. I hadn't touched a piano since Tuesday, and there was only one practice room, which I never got around to signing up for. So Friday night I ask Rebecca what the earliest time slot was for the room, and decided I would get up early enough to go practice. She said the earliest time slot was at 8 am, so I woke up at 7-ish and went down to practice at 7:30 (Amanda decided to come with me). Unfortunately, it turned out that the earliest practice session was at 7 am instead of 8 am, and someone was already in there practicing. I was disappointed but knew that it was my fault for not getting a practice slot, so we went back upstairs. Amanda sits down to write her music, and I learned that she did not have her music prepared for her flute solo. I had found out on the bus that she had left it at home, but she had blank staff paper that she had been using to write the music out on the bus, and I had assumed that between Thursday and Friday she had found time to finish that copy and make two more copies. Obviously I was wrong. Andy had gotten someone at the front desk to copy the coach's index Thursday night, so I told Amanda to hurry up and finish that copy and take it downstairs to make the other two copies. She finishes writing out the music, and both she and I get dressed for her flute solo.

While Amanda goes to make her other copies, I go to watch Rebecca Garia's piano solo. It was AMAZING!!! She did really well! She ended up getting a gold medal for that, which she definitely deserved! Her piano solo was at 8:50; Amanda's flute solo was at 9:15. After Rebecca's solo, Amanda was nowhere to be found. So I rush downstairs to find her eating breakfast. I felt bad, but I told her to stop eating and made her come up with me to the instrumental solo room. She and I warmed up. I'm not sure what Amanda did, but there were a couple rough spots in the accompaniment for myself so I just went over those parts over and over. Finally it was Amanda's turn to go. She introduced herself, and I could tell she was nervous. At the beginning of the song, Amanda plays by herself with no accompaniment. She starts out with Amazing Grace, and then transitions to Come Thou Fount. But instead of starting out with Amazing Grace, Amanda starts with Come Thou Fount. I just sat there wondering exactly what I was going to do, but figured we'd get through it. All of a sudden, Amanda realizes what she's done, stops, says "Why did I do that?" and starts over. Despite that rocky start, Amanda did really well with her solo. Last year she had trouble remembering the music, but that wasn't a problem for her this year. She got silver. Ben went right after Amanda with his violin solo. I had heard it a couple times without the accompaniment, but WITH the accompaniment it seriously sounded ten times better! I had to restrain myself from clapping in time with the song. It was SOOOO good!!! Ben got gold for his solo, of course!

After Ben's solo, I hurried upstairs to change from the dress I was wearing into my suit for my public speaking. Brian went before me. He combined his two facebook notes "Ashes to Ashes" and "True Love". Perhaps it was just me, but I didn't think the two messages together flowed nearly as nicely as either message does standing on its own. Nevertheless, he did a good job and got silver. After Brian finished his speech, I went off to the corner of the room and started warming up my Indian accent that I use in my speech. I was REALLY nervous for some reason. Rachel, Amanda, and Daniel prayed with me, which helped. Then my mom, Mrs. Garia, and Mrs. Snodgrass all prayed with me too, which helped a LOT. I don't know what it is, but there is something about mother's prayers that makes them really special. I can't put my finger on what it is, but they really are. Then, it's my turn. I give the judges my outline, tell them that it's in the teens/adult category and 15-20 minutes long. Then they ask whether the speech is an original or a retelling of a story, drama, etc. So I explain that I start out with original material, then transition into retelling a story, then transition back to an original gospel presentation. I was really nervous during the original parts of the speech-I had only written them about a week before. I felt like I stumbled over a lot of words and didn't use emphasis where I had wanted to. But the dramatic interp was a lot of fun. I've worked on that since October or November and I've gotten to the point where I'm pretty comfortable with it. At the end of the speech, although I felt I could have done better, I was satisfied with how it went. I didn't find this out until later, but apparently I made Mrs. Garia and Mrs. Snodgrass cry.

After my speech, I took my garment bag (which had my piano solo dress in it), went to the restroom, and changed for the fourth time that day (Mr. Altobelli started making fun of me for that). I may be wrong on this, and if I am Amanda can correct me, but I'm pretty sure after I changed that Amanda took my garment bag with her upstairs to change into her (really my) expressive arts dress and get ready for her dance. Andy's piano solo was at 11:00. He did well with it and got silver. My piano solo was right after him at 11:10. Due to not having practiced my song since Tuesday, I had several memory slips and other problems. I didn't feel like I did well, but I still managed to get silver. After my piano solo, Mrs. Wohl informs me that Amanda is missing something and is having a breakdown upstairs. So I rush upstairs to be informed by Amanda that she does not have her music for her dance. I start thinking and decide that the only way Amanda is going to get her song is to download it off the internet. Knowing that Brian and Marcelo had their laptops, I instructed her to go find one of them and have them download it for her (despite not having her expressive arts CD, she did have a random blank CD). I had my credit card and was ready to pay for it, but luckily Marcelo had an iTunes gift card that he used. I then send Amanda to go get her outline. After a while, she has not come downstairs, so I run upstairs to see what's taking her so long. She informs me that she cannot find her outline. Had she realized that earlier in the week, or even the day, she could have easily written out her outline and had it ready. But at this point she is supposed to be ready to perform in five minutes. There is absolutely no time. And although I'm pretty good at finding ways to work around problems (last year the CD for our dance broke, but we realized it before we even left so I was able to get Amanda's dad to e-mail us the song and we downloaded it onto a CD), this was one problem that we were NOT going to be able to work around in five minutes. So I just looked her in the eye and told her she was going to go downstairs and tell the judges that she didn't have an outline for them. I was pretty irritated at this point (don't worry Amanda, I still love you!) So we get down there and set up the CD player. I really wish we had had time to go through the entire song and make sure it had downloaded correctly, but we didn't so I just played the first 30 seconds, pretending to be adjusting the volume. Since those first 30 seconds worked fine, I had to just go on faith that the rest of the CD worked as well. The judges were really nice about Amanda forgetting her outline. They gave her a sheet of paper and asked her to write a paragraph or so of her thoughts on what she was doing. So she quickly scribbled a paragraph on how we should be able to use dance to worship the Lord. Finally, Amanda got up to do her dance. It started out okay, but around the first chorus the CD and the player started having major problems and it kept skipping. I didn't watch a good amount of Amanda's dance, actually, because I would close my eyes and pray that the CD would stop skipping. But I did get to see most of it. There were parts that I could definitely tell she was improvising. And pretty early on in the dance, the left ballet slipper came off her heel and she had to do the rest of the dance with it hanging off. She seemed really poised for all the problems she was having. I was expecting her to get a really bad score because of all the problems, pretty much all of them having to do with lack of preparation, but she ended up getting bronze. Our last fine arts performer, Rachel Wohl, did a classical ballet dance to a song by Tchaikowsky (sp?) as an interpretation of Psalm 23. To tell you the truth, I was a bit skeptical, but I was TOTALLY BLOWN AWAY by the dance! The only complaint I would have is that I didn't feel the dance interpreted all parts of Psalm 23, only certain parts. But that's it. Other than that, it was wonderful, her technique was awesome, and the parts that she did interpret were interpreted wonderfully. I truly, honestly thought that she would get gold or silver. She spent hours preparing this dance, and it showed. But you know what she got? Not gold. Not silver. Not even bronze. That's right, she got participation! I was SO furious when I found out. In all honesty, I have never been happy with the way fine arts judges judge, but this year was definitely the worst. If Amanda, with all the problems she had and the lack of technique, got bronze, then Rachel deserved at least silver! The judges preferred Amanda's dance because her song had lyrics, and they felt Rachel's dance wasn't spiritual enough. I am SO MAD about this! A well-executed dance set to classical music is MUCH more spirtually edifying than a dance to a song with lyrics which is not well prepared. I really need to sit down and write a letter to awana stating my problems with the expressive arts judges. They really don't know how to judge properly. Maybe when I go back next year I'll judge expressive arts.

Anyways, that was fine arts...

SUMMIT-Friday-Evening

2008-05-10T21:06:00.003-05:00

So after citation ceremony we go out to eat. We finally got to walk over the bridge over the river, which is really nice at night. I don't remember the name of the place we went to, but it was a REALLY expensive, really fancy restaurant. There were only three things on the menu. Knowing how expensive the food was, Rachel Barnett and I decided to split. It's a three-course meal, so the salad comes out first. I was STARVING because I had eaten NOTHING since I had my half a sandwich at lunch, so I eat the entire salad. I was thinking that maybe I shouldn't have, if dinner was good and I wasn't able to eat it all I would be sad...then dinner actually came out. The portions were TINY! Okay not tiny, but really small! I was SO glad that I had eaten the entire salad, especially since Rachel and I were splitting. We had chosen the blackened fish, asparagus, and mashed potatoes dish. It was REALLY good and I was disappointed the portions were small. After that we got ice cream. It wasn't a whole lot of food, but it was definitely enough to satisfy. Several of us were really tired and had to get up early the next morning in order to prepare for fine arts, so we got up to go not long after everyone finished. Some of us ended up waiting in the lobby for the others. While we were waiting, I looked inside a doorway to another room in the restaurant-the bar. PEOPLE WERE SWING DANCING IN THERE!!!!!!!!!!! Oh my goodness I was SO disappointed, I wanted to go in there and start dancing!!!! I love dancing!!!!! But I had to settle for swaying in time to the music outside the door. We walked back to the hotel. When we get back to our room, I notice that my bag (which has my money, cell phone, and Bible inside of it) was NOT on my bed like I was expecting. I had asked one of my friends to bring it down with her to citation ceremony and give it to me aftewards, but when I asked her for it, she said she didn't have it. I assumed that she had left it in our room. But that ended up not being the case. Rachel reminded her that indeed, she HAD taken the bag down to citation ceremony. Unfortunately, she had no clue what had happened to it after that. I was getting ready for bed when Daniel Clark knocked on our door and asked if we wanted to watch the Summit DVD from last year. I said sure, so Rachel and I went down to Daniel's room to see whether or not it was suitable for girls to come in lol. On our way back to our room Rachel starts running real fast, and I start running after her...I yell "Rachel why are we running?" Brian was sitting in the hallway, heard us coming, and stuck his foot out in the middle of the hallway. Rachel ran around it, but I jumped over it instead of running around it. Big mistake. I lost my balance landing on the other side, slipped, fell, and skinned my left knee really bad. OH MY GOODNESS IT HURT SOOOOOO MUCH!!!! It didn't look like it was bleeding, so I just decided to wait until after we watched the DVD to deal with it. Altobelli, seeing that several of us are gathered in the one room, decides to call a team meeting in that room. During the meeting, Altobelli brought up the problem of disunity on our team. Part of me was going "And you just now noticed this?" but I was SO glad the issue was finally being brought up! Jonathan started talking about how we didn't really have a set schedule so people went off to do their own thing...and the discussion started to get off track. That problem was a symptom, not the root issue. Finally someone brought it back to the root issue: disrespect. We discussed the proper way to handle problems with team members based on Matthew 18. Someone said something about "Well, we're not going to suddenly become a unified team in the course of two days" to which Daniel replied "Never underestimate God" and told about his freshman year in Ft. Worth. We prayed, and all went back to our rooms to get some sleep. During this entire meeting my knee was THROBBING in major pain. The pain made it a little difficult to get to sleep that night.

Quick Explanation of Color Schemes

2008-05-06T00:12:00.002-05:00

This is really, really random, and in all honesty probably nobody cares, but if you've been following my blog over the past several months you've probably noticed several changes in layout and color scheme. It seems random but each color scheme actually has a purpose behind it. I decided when I made this blog that I wanted to have a color scheme having to do with Summit.

The first color scheme was red/black/white, with black being the dominant color. This trio of colors has been our church's official Summit color scheme ever since my freshman year. I started out with black as the dominant color, but then my blog looked almost exactly like Marcelo's blog. So I changed it to red as the dominant color. After that I changed it to white as the dominant color.

Then we decided that we weren't going with that color scheme this year. When we got our new Summit pants they were gray, blue, and black. So my blog got changed to that color scheme.

The current color scheme seems very girly, and it is. It's basically going off of the color of my citation dress.

Anyways, there's a random explanation you probably didn't care to know.

SUMMIT-Friday-Citation ceremony

2008-05-05T23:29:00.004-05:00

So after taking team pictures I went up to my room to get ready for citation ceremony. Ironed my dress, took a quick shower, did makeup...didn't get to finish my hair before I had to run down to the ballroom. After getting quickly briefed on how the ceremony was going to go, we found our seats and waited for the ceremony to start. I sat next to a girl named Mary who was in the participation and gold rounds with us. We got to talk quite a bit, which was very fun! So the ceremony begins. I finally figured out who NewEnglandIte08 from the Awana forums is! Citation was, for the most part, uneventful. The fine arts performances were really good, especially the piano performance. As a side note, I found out that Matthew Swift is also going to Baylor! How cool is that? Anyways, we had eight people from Grace getting their citations, five boys (Matthew Boyd, Andrew Garia, Marcelo Gonzalez, Ben Kenagy, and Jonathan Snodgrass) and three girls (myself, Arielle Timmons, and Adriane Wass). I felt kind of bad for Andy-the announcer mispronounced his last name. It's supposed to rhyme with "area", but instead he pronounced it as if it was "Garcia" missing the c.

But my walk across the stage was very special. I had actually decided months beforehand that just shaking Art Rorheim's hand wasn't going to be enough. So when they called my name, I walked across the stage, took Art's hand, leaned over and kissed him on the cheek! Art exclaimed "Oh!" it was so sweet! Then I went over to Jack Edgar and did the same thing. The photographer took the picture, and I accidentally ended up over-staying my time on stage because I, being the absent-minded person I am, hand never bother to notice that everyone was exiting the stage by walking in front of Jack, so I try to take a step back and go behind him like the seniors last year did...of course, that's not what they want, so Jack keeps pressing his hand on my back to try to get me to move forward. I think I ended up staying on stage an extra five seconds or so before I actually figured out what he wanted me to do. Yeah, advice for everyone in the future: make sure you know how you're supposed to get on and off the stage!

Shaking the missionary's hands was incredibly fun. Apparently a lot of the missionaries remembered my team from quiz because that was the subject the missionaries brought up the most frequently in conversation. I also got asked where I was from a lot, as well as what my plans for next year are. And almost all the missionaries commented on my dress.

After the ceremony is over, Marissa takes me over to meet SparksDirectorFlorida!!! I was SOOOOOOOOO excited to finally get to meet her! I also got to talk with my mom briefly. It was pretty hilarious, she said "You were the only one who kissed Art Rorheim instead of shaking his hand"-with absolutely no facial expressions, vocal inflections, or anything that would give me a clue as to whether this was a good or bad thing. I thought she was angry for a minute, so I responded "Mhmm, and...?" To which my mom smiled and said "It was so sweet!" :D

The we went off to dinner...

SUMMIT-Friday-The rest of quiz

2008-05-03T20:18:00.004-05:00

So from this point on which questions were asked in which round start to get kind of muddled. I'll do my best to remember but I'll probably end up making some wrong statements in this post.

Bronze round was good. We had several correct questions, one of which Rachel B. made up (explanations of our standing). She did such a good job, I really thought that she was reciting straight out of the book and didn't have any clue she was making up her answer. That's actually similar to something I did last year, when they asked for definitions of the four words found in 2 Timothy 3:16. Problem being that the book gives no definitions, so I made up definitions on the spot. We also got a couple wrong. One of them was a Bible summary that Amanda knew and would have gotten right, except she messed up the date. Another one was a question from Rose's lesson that had three parts "What is the purpose of the government, what should our view of it be, and what should or response be?" or something like that. We got the question second, so we were able to hear the full question, but unfortunately because the question was SO LONG Rose couldn't remember what the third part of the question was! Which I TOTALLY don't blame her for, I couldn't remember it either, and I didn't even have to think about what the answer was! One other question that I remember, I'm still not positive it should have been wrong, but there's nothing I could really do about it. They asked for the five ways God judges with references. I get up and recite the list what I'm pretty sure is word-perfect, but they count it wrong. Apparently I said "truth" twice, even though I didn't think I did, my team didn't think I did, and my mother didn't think I did. Oh well. But Brian questioned that one, which made me incredibly happy. There is nothing more frustrating than a coach that does not question. Even though we didn't get it, the fact that he questioned at all made me incredibly happy. After speed we were tied for fourth. We missed three paddle questions (one because it was oddly worded, the other two were just a lack of studying), and ended up shifting down to 10th, the last spot to move on. I don't know why we felt it necessary to just barely get by the first two rounds!

So then it's lunchtime, I run over to Marissa's room to see how they did. I got to meet Ricki! Amanda came up to me and said "Do you want to meet Ricki?" to which I promptly snapped out of whatever I was doing and said "Yes! Where is she?" Amanda points to the door, and I immediately recognize her standing there. I go up to her and give her a hug, and tell her that she's just as pretty as the photo she had shown me :). After they announce which teams are going on and which rooms they are in (I was SO DISAPPOINTED to hear we would be in the same room!), we head back over to meet the rest of the team-only I see Taylor in the lunch line and I stop and talk with him for a good five or ten minutes. By the time I finally get around to getting back with the rest of the team, they've left for lunch. So after calling around, I finally get ahold of Andy and find out that they're already at the Jacksonville landing for lunch. So Rachel B, Amanda, and myself walk over there, eat lunch really quickly, and rush back to be in our room on time.

So the silver round, we were in the same room as team 2. I was really, really hoping we would be in separate rooms so that there would be 10 possible spots for both teams to reach for in order to get to gold, but instead now there are only 5. But in the end, it didn't matter. The first speed question was "According to 1 Timothy 4:12-" I hear a buzz and quickly press our buzzer. Then the quizmaster calls out the number of team 2. This makes me VERY excited! But then I start getting even more excited when ADRIANE stands up to answer the question!!! She recited the verse word-perfect and it answered the question so they got the points!!! I WAS SO EXCITED FOR HER!!!!! Especially considering that for the longest time, 1 Timothy 4:12 was the ONLY thing she knew! Haha, she got her question! :D So the rest of the speed round goes on...I know we got a few questions wrong at the beginning and several questions right at the end. The only question I remember from this round was the distinctives of Paul's message. I recited the list perfectly until I got the last reference. I said "1 Thessalonians 4:14" and quit. The correct reference is 1 Thessalonians 4:14-17. To this day I still have no clue why I quit. I KNEW the list, there shouldn't have been any hesitation on that reference at all. But for some reason I stood there wondering whether or not I should say "through 17" or not. When the judge asked me "Is that your answer?" I finally decided that I should say "through 17" but I knew I didn't have enough time to go back and redo the entire thing, so I just said "No. Actually, everything I said was correct, with the exception of that last reference, which is 1 Thessalonians 4:14-17". They counted it right. The quizmaster smiled at me and said "I had hoped you would go back and correct that!" There was also one other question that I remember that I'm not sure was in either bronze or silver round, but the question was "List and describe two of the laws that Paul talks about". I got about, talked about the law of Moses, then started in on the law of sin and death, which I said was talked about in Romans 8:2-then I stopped. All of a sudden I wasn't sure that Romans 8:2 was the correct reference anymore. So instead I throw out what I said and start over and go with the law of Moses and the law of the Spirit of life instead (both didn't have parentheticals). Which I was okay with, because I actually knew the law of the Spirit of Life better than the law of sin and death. I had Brian look it up for me in between rounds and Romans 8:2 WAS correct-why did I hesitate? What was wrong with me? I don't know. What I do know is in the end, we tied for first and team 2 got fifth, so BOTH TEAMS WENT ON TO GOLD!!!!! Oh I was SO excited!!!!!!!

So Gold round starts out very interesting. The practice question, which my team got secondhanded, wasn't even a question "Have your entire team stand up and sing the AWANA theme song". Haha, I had SO much fun with that! I know Rachel B and Rose were slightly embarassed but I totally sang my heart out! It was so much fun! The only question I had in my mind was "Did I start us in a good key signature?". Which I did-I picked the PERFECT key signature for my voice, which made me happy! So the real speed round begins. I mess up by buzzing in on "Give the four things that believers-" because I assumed that "believers" was a key word in the title of the list they were asking for. Unfortunately, no list of four things contains the word "believers" in the title, so I had no clue what list they were asking for. So yeah, if I hadn't buzzed in and missed that question for us we might have gone on to platinum. We also got a few questions correct. Multiple choice was easy, we got 100%. In this room we got the super-cool quizmaster who calls out "The correct answer is B! The correct answer is B!" I LOVE THAT QUIZMASTER SO MUCH!!!! Haha before the round I told Rose all about him, and when he started talking Rose exclaimed "Oh my goodness, he's adorable!" She totally fell in love with him (not literally) right there and decided that she wanted him to be her prom date (inside joke). In the end, we ended up placing 6th and missing platinum round by 5 POINTS!!!! Taylor told me later that it would almost be better to be obviously beaten than to be so close, but I have to disagree.

But in all honesty, I think that's why God had us FIGHT to get out of participation earlier in the day. If we hadn't been put in that position, I truly think I would have been frustrated and upset with our 6th place finish. But after going through the participation ordeal, I was VERY happy with our gold round finish! Team 2 was right behind us, tied for seventh and missing platinum by about 15 points.

We went outside to the river and took a bunch of team pictures.

Side note: Paddle question were HORRIBLE at Summit!!! Seriously!! Participation round, "What was your main study on?" Seriously? I can even understand that as a participation speed question, but MULTIPLE CHOICE??? Come on!!! But beyond that, most of the questions you didn't even have to read the book to know the answer to, you just had to know basic theology! And one question-"Love should be without...C. Romans 16:25?" What the heck? Throughout the whole day there were only a few questions I thought were good, and one of them was THROWN OUT even though it was a perfectly legitimate question!!! ARGH!!!

Alright, enough venting about multiple choice. It was bad, and I'll leave it at that.

SUMMIT-Friday-Quiz Participation Round

2008-05-03T16:49:00.005-05:00

So we wake up Friday morning and get ready for quiz. Andy was ready early so I sent him down to Einstein's bagels to pick up breakfast for us. About ten minutes before we're supposed to be down in the ballroom Altobelli knocks on our door and informs me that Brian was not awake. Since Altobelli was heading down to their room to check on Brian again, I followed behind him. But knowing that Brian probably was awake at that point, I stood about ten feet away from the door so that he wouldn't see me when they opened the door. I figured if Brian WAS awake, no reason to bug him. He was awake, and I was about to turn around and head back to my room when Altobelli decides it is necessary to announce that I'm there as well. From inside the room I hear Brian mutter something and Everett yell "Tell Shaney to quit worrying!" Gah. So much for not being bothersome.

So while I was ready on time, a few of the other girls weren't, so I stayed upstairs awhile longer pushing them to finish up. By the time we got downstairs, Brian was already down there, pointing out how I had been concerned about him not being there and then not being there on time myself. Luckily we still had a little bit of time before the round started, so we quickly ate a few bites of breakfast and prayed.

So, participation speed round gets off to a good start. The practice question was "How much is the moon worth?" The first team that buzzed in didn't know and guess "a million dollars". We were the second team to buzz in, and I'm racking my brain for what the answer could possibly be when Amanda says "I know this". She gets up and states confidently "It's worth a dollar because it has four quarters". I burst out laughing in my seat. She got it right-for 0 points, of course :P So then the speed round actually starts. A couple of questions into it the quizmaster says "For forty points, recite Romans-" and I buzz in!!! THE ENTIRE BOOK IS ROMANS!!!!! What was I THINKING??? Unfortunately we have to answer something, so I stand up and quickly recite Romans 1:16-17. I recited it word perfect, but unfortunately they were looking for Romans 13:8, not 1:16-17. Yeah, that puts us 40 points negative. Not good. I think we answer some other question right for 15 or 20 points. Then I buzz in on "Romans-" AGAIN!!!!!! OH MY FREAKIN' GOSH WHAT WAS WRONG WITH ME?????? THE ENTIRE FREAKIN' BOOK IS ROMANS!!!!!!!! Rachel has Rose stand up and recite Romans 6:4. She recites it word perfect, but unfortunately it's not the verse they're looking for. Yeah, not good. We're waaaaaaaaaaay in the negative thanks to me. We answered one other question wrong because Rachel thought it was something from her lesson (it was actually from mine, I shouldn't have let her stand up) and a few right, but we're still in the negative by the end of the speed round. Paddles, we get one question wrong. Which again, is my fault. The question asked about two natures and included the phrase "At the time of salvation". Well as soon as I heard that phrase I thought about the phrase in the book that says that at the time of salvation our old and new natures are instantly in conflict, and then totally zone out on how the rest of the question is phrased. So yeah, we get that one wrong. So at the end of the round, Brian tells us we are 17th out of 18 teams, and only the top 14 go on. So yeah, I was kind of upset about that. I had an odd peace about it, though, for two reasons:

(1) I was the only senior on our team, and it was my fault that we had done so poorly. The only person whose chances of ever doing well in quiz again had been shot down were mine. Rachel, Rose, and Amanda all have more chances. Last year, I messed up a speed quiz question and got our team out in the silver round, and I felt really bad about it because it was Daniel Clark's last year. This year, it was my last year. If we got out because of something I messed up, I could deal with that.
(2) I got out in the participation round my freshman year, so getting out in the participation round my senior year carried a feeling of going out the same way I came in, which I was okay with.

So although I was upset, I still also had an odd peace about the whole situation. As the quizmasters and judges are tallying up the final scores, I'm sitting in my chair trying to figure out how I am going to convince Andy to let me take on the coaching of team 2. All of a sudden they announce there is a tiebreaker for 14th place. It was between team number 1, Bayshore Bible from Corpus Christi, TX (the only other TX team in the round that I remember), and...team number 8, Grace Covenant #1! OH MY FREAKIN' GOSH!!! HOW IN THE WORLD DID WE END UP IN A TIE???? I don't know how that worked but praise be to God almighty! Of course, we know we're not out of the hole yet. So we go into a three minute tiebreaker. Both teams answer a few questions, I know we got some wrong and some right, I don't remember about the other team. At the end of the three minutes, it's announced that we tied!!!!! A tiebreaker resulting in a tie??? What are you trying to do, raise my blood pressure? Anyways, we go into tiebreaker number 2. Another three minutes, similar to the first three...and at the end of that one we are tied AGAIN!!!!!!!!! WHAT THE FREAKIN' HECK????? My heart rate must have been through the roof at that point. So finally we go into one minute sudden death. The quizmaster asks the first question, "Name and give a brief description of the two examples that Paul brings up to illustrate the righteousness of God". The other team buzzes in and gets it wrong. It goes to us. At this point, it's totally gone over my head that we've won. Even if we get the question wrong, they still have more negative points than we do. For some reason, I was thinking that we HAD to get it right in order to advance! So I get up and start talking...there is so much information on those two examples that I had no clue what they wanted included in the "brief" description so I basically just gave everything I could remember, I talked really fast and basically gave a 30 second impromptu speech. We're told that is correct, and I nearly freak out-WE MADE IT OUT OF THE PARTICIPATION ROUND!!!!!!

Now at this point, it hits me exactly WHO we knocked out. Bayshore Bible from Corpus Christi, the church that the Bickhams and the Hardys go to!!!! Oh I was SO disappointed that of all the teams I knocked out, I knocked out THAT team!!!! But Mrs. Bickham was so sweet about it, she said that she would rather that we have knocked them out than a total stranger.
So yeah, that was basically the heart attack round.

SUMMIT-The way there and Thursday

2008-04-29T12:23:00.000-05:00

So much for updating in Jacksonville.

So I guess I get to do all my updating now :)

The trip to Jacksonville took about 21-ish hours. I watched Phantom of the Opera for the first time-amazing movie and officially one of my favorites. Amanda and I had long conversation in the evening about God's will and how our plans fit (or don't fit) into His plan. Studied for quiz...I'm sure more happened but that's all I remember, besides the most major event for me: getting sick. This was the third out of four years that I got sick on the way to Summit.

So the diesel fuel line broke while we were on the road in the middle of the night. The driver managed to get us to a gas station. I was asleep while this happened so I was unaware that I was inhaling a bunch of gas fumes. When we got to the station I woke up a little bit but was so tired that I just stayed on the bus...about five minutes later, a wave of nausea hits me and I hurry off the bus into the gas station restroom, where I tried to throw up...only I had nothing in my system to throw up. It was awful. I finally get myself to the point where I wasn't trying to throw up anymore, although I was still incredibly nauseas, as well as tired and dizzy. So we decide to go over to McDonald's to get breakfast. I'm standing in line, waiting to order my food, when I couldn't stand upright anymore...I would have fallen to the ground, but luckily Andy was right next to me so I grabbed him before I actually fell. A couple girls helped me over to a table. Unfortunately when everybody's food came it only made the nausea worse...especially when Mrs. Wohl's coffee came out. The smell made me want to puke. Mrs. Wohl later told me "Now you know what it feels like to be pregnant". I managed to take two sips of chocolate milk and eat one pancake. That was all I could stomach. Taylor Lassiter (our AWANA missionary) did a devotion with us based on a passage in Colossians. Although we're ready to get back on the bus, the bus is not yet fixed. So we walk back over to the gas station, and I lay down on the concrete sidewalk. About ten minutes later I'm told it's time to go. Rose helps me up, but as soon as I stand up I get hit in the side of the head with the frisbee. It didn't feel good at all. When I finally made it on the bus I was sent straight to the back, where I zonked pretty much immediately and slept for several hours straight. I felt soooooo much better after that.

So we get to the hotel and check in. I take a shower and then go with Altobelli, Everett, Brian, Andy, and Jeff to the leader's meeting, where we find out about several rule changed for games. So after finding Marissa and Lauren (YAY for finally getting to meet them in person!) we call a team meeting to discuss the new rule changes. I don't remember what happened after that (if anything), but opening ceremonies that night was a lot of fun. The worship was amazing!!!!!! We went out to eat at a really, REALLY expensive Italian restaurant afterwards. That night Rachel and I find out that Amanda lost her quiz dress and had no clue whatsoever where it was. Luckily Rachel brought an extra brown dress to Summit so we were fine.

I'm sure more happened that I'll remember at a later time, but for now, that was the trip to Jacksonville and day 1.

THIS IS IT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

2008-04-23T12:05:00.002-05:00

THIS IS IT!!!!!! THIS IS THE END!!!! THE JOURNEY IS OVER!!!! I LEAVE MY HOUSE IN ONE HOUR AND I WILL NOT RETURN UNTIL SUMMIT IS DONE!!!!!!!!

I should have internet access in Jacksonville, though, so I'll probably still be updating :)

I would rather not go through this again...

2008-04-22T20:06:00.002-05:00

Last year I sprained my ankle a week before Summit. It healed pretty well during that week but on games day my ankle ended up hurting really, really bad to the point that Everett had to carry me to closing ceremonies that night, I couldn't walk on my ankle.

At our pratice last night, the front of my left leg and foot started hurting really bad, and today as I was walking down the stairs a burst of pain shot up my leg, and now it is sore.

I hope my leg gets better before games, because I don't want to go through pain this year the same way I did last year.

Looking back...

2008-04-22T11:24:00.002-05:00

We had our last games and quiz practice last night. Although there is stuff to write about it I don't feel like writing about it right now.

But driving home in the car last night, I started thinking about the fact that this is it, this my senior year, my last chance...and started thinking over the journey of the past eight or nine months, thinking about what I had done and what kind of legacy I'm going to leave behind. And I asked myself, what did I do right that I would suggest to the team next year to do?

You know what the answer I came up with was?

Nothing.

No joke. I could not think of one single thing I did correctly all year.

So of course, then I ask, what would I suggest they do differently next year?

Everything.

I know that when we get back from Florida I am going to sit down and write down the specifics of what I did wrong and what I wish I did instead. Just right now suffice it to say that I've messed up. If I could sum up my performance as a senior in one sentence, it would be this: I made a mistake. Actually, more like I made multiple mistakes. If my team does well in the competition this week, it will be a combination of two things: 1) The grace of God, 2) The efforts of other people who actually managed to do things right.

We leave for Summit tomorrow. I am not ready. But I have to go. We'll see how things go.

I feel really bad...most everyone else is pumped and excited for Summit. I am stressed out, not excited at all, kinda in a bad mood, and upset with a few of my teammates. I think my main prayer request for myself is that my bad disposition doesn't end up pulling the team down...if I'm lucky, maybe God will give me a little bit of sunshine and a smile on my face.

I love my team!!!

2008-04-20T17:36:00.004-05:00

So we had games practice for five hours yesterday. Arielle didn't show up until four so when we practiced girl's basketball relay I was in the center. Oh my goodness I was doing SO horrible and no matter how hard I tried I couldn't seem to fix all the problems I was having. After practicing girl's basketball for awhile I was REALLY frustrated and upset, and knowing that my senior Summit games and last chance EVER was in exactly one week I was also really stressed out. I had also started out stressed out about games because during our last Saturday practice I was having a bad "off" day with balloon relay and, although Arielle hasn't decided anything yet, I'm pretty sure that after seeing me that day Arielle has decided that she wants to replace me with Alex (and after seeing the videos of my performance, I don't blame her at all!) The thought of getting replaced in balloon really stresses me out because it is my favorite event. I also haven't been doing my exercises because I got REALLY sick at the end of March and didn't even get to the point where I could breath properly until recently. That's probably one reason why I did so horrible at the last practice. So, the combination of that and the horrible basketball practice just pushed me to the verge of tears. I was really upset and did not want anyone to see me cry so I went to another part of the building, walked out the door, and went and locked myself in my car. I had really hoped that no one would find me for a good five minutes so I could just cry, but the girls found me in about two minutes. Of course it only took them ten seconds once they found me to realize that I had locked myself in and wasn't going to respond to them. I felt like such a jerk for acting the way I did but I was just really upset and mad at myself and stressed out and didn't want anyone around. So the girls finally left. About three to five minutes later Rose comes back out and very sweetly asks me if I wanted to talk. No, I did not want to talk, but Rose asked so sweetly that I went ahead and unlocked the car door. And right there, in my car, I spilled out everything and cried really, really hard. Rose was incredibly sweet, she comforted me and prayed for me. After that I calmed down, went back inside and kept practicing. I don't really feel that I improved at all the rest of the practice and that still has me stressed out, but there's nothing I can really do about it at this point.

We also practiced tug, pulling Brian's truck up the hill over and over. After going through that I hope that I get to do tug at least once at Summit...

Arielle got there at four and we practiced girl's basketball with her in the center. After a few run throughs she tripped over the center pin and fell on her ankle. According to Everett she bruised it and didn't actually twist or sprain it, but today Arielle said her ankle is really swollen. I am praying that she makes a full recovery by Saturday, because God knows how much we need her in games and how much I suck at basketball center.

After games practice, six out of the eight girls going to Summit got dressed up and went out to Olive Garden for dinner. Wow, that was definitely one of the best, most fun evenings of my life. Those girls are all incredibly amazing and getting to spend time with them was one of the best things ever. I know the guys hung out together but I guarantee you that they didn't have nearly as much fun as the girls had :D We took tons of pictures and had so much fun. It was amazing to be able to enjoy the company of all the Summit girls outside of the context of Summit or AWANA. I LOVE MY SUMMIT GIRLS!!!!

This is it. I'm going down.

2008-04-17T22:33:00.001-05:00

Summit is almost here and the devil has gone into full attack mode. Today he dealt two heavy blows. First off, Rose is injured. She got kicked by her horse. Luckily she says she should be fully recovered in a week-pretty much the exact amount of time we have. The second thing affected me more than it affected the team. Something happened, and I felt like someone stabbed me in the gut with a knife. I am not going to talk about it, just suffice it to say that someone made a mistake, and I made a mistake in my reaction, and in the process I felt deeply hurt. Looking back, I realize I shouldn't have. But I did. After those two blows were dealt we got together as a team and prayed. While someone else was praying I started crying, and left to go cry in the restroom. Apparently after the rest of the team finished praying, Brian sent the girls in to console me. Arielle asked me what was wrong, and instead of just being honest the way I usually am, I lied. I said that it was just a bunch of stress building up. Which is partially true, but not the main reason I was upset. I think if just one, or maybe even two girls had been there I would have told what was really upsetting me, but for some reason with all of them there I didn't have the will to tell the truth. Mistake number two.

Now I am sitting here, fighting tears and wishing I could go back and do things differently. If I could, I wouldn't have reacted the way I did. I also would have been honest about what was upsetting me. Because now I'm sitting here dealing with the situation on my own. In everything that has gone on with Summit this year there have always been people there supporting me. I know those same people are ready to help me through this too...but somehow, I can't find it within myself to let them. In fact, this is the first time that I don't want them to help me through. Well, that's not entirely true...I really do want someone to help me through this. But in order to let them, I'm going to have to be honest about a LOT of stuff. And at this point in time, that's something I would rather not do.

God help me.

Practice Tonight

2008-04-07T23:06:00.002-05:00

Was pretty decently good. Not great, but good. Girls basketball needs work (And ARIELLE), team basketball needs to shave off one or two seconds, Rose and I need to work on three legged, we need all the girls there so we can practice balloon...

Tonight was a really good night for making inside jokes. During basketball relay practice we were using a medicine ball, I was in the middle, I pushed it and made a grunting noise, and Rachel made the comment, "Push it like you're giving birth!" Hahaha it was soooooo funny, we started talking like that the entire night..."Don't drop the baby!" "I feel like I'm giving birth!" Hahahaha...but what was REALLY funny was when Rachel asked me "So who's the father?" While I answered "I don't know!", across the circle Brian raised his hand. Apparently he didn't hear Rachel ask the question, but it was HILARIOUS!!! So yeah, now I'm pregnant and Brian is the father. Everyone who wasn't there tonight is going to be sooooo confused when we have our next Summit practice...don't you just love inside jokes?

Quiz practice was good tonight...I now know my weak areas: in-text parentheticals and information. I know all the list parentheticals but need to learn the in-text ones.

A Song

2008-04-07T00:04:00.001-05:00

I wrote this song tonight, based on what God has been teaching me through Summit.

Blood flows down from the one on the cross
Someone else's gain has resulted in his loss
Because he cared he took it all
Every sin since the fall
And now the innocent hangs in agony

You never thought that it would hurt so much to care
The heavy burden is just too much to bear
And so you lie awake and night
Pray and cry and fight the fight
And your heart cries out in agony

God are you there?
God do you care?
Why are you leaving me here to bleed and die?

God can't you see?
What is your plan for me?
Why are you leavng me here to bleed and die?

The cross
Think about the cross
Because he cared he took on so much pain
The cross
Think about the cross
Someone else has died for others' gain

You're not the only one
You're not the only one to go through hell for another
Think about the Son
Who went through more because He's the great lover

And in that moment you stand still
And you realize...

What could be more beautiful
Than to rest in the arms of One who's been there too?
What could be more wonderful
Than to understand what He went through for you?
What could possibly be more romantic
Than experiencing the heart of your lover
As you care for another
What could be more wonderful
What could be more beautiful

God are you there?
God do you care?
Why are you leaving me here to bleed and die?

God can't you see?
What is your plan for me?
Why are you leavng me here to bleed and die?

The cross
Think about the cross
Because he cared he took on so much pain
The cross
Think about the cross
Someone else has died for others' gain

Blood flows down from the one on the cross
Someone else's gain has resulted in his loss
Because he cared he took it all
Every sin since the fall
And now the innocent hangs in agony

What could be more beautiful
Than to rest in the arms of One who's been there too?
What could be more wonderful
Than to understand what He went through for you?
What could possibly be more romantic
Than experiencing the heart of your lover
As you care for another
What could be more wonderful
What could be more beautiful

What could be more wonderful
What could be more beautiful

More Pictures from Quiz

2008-04-04T08:29:00.008-05:00

Grace Covenant Team A-aka Brian's Beautiful and Intelligent Girls

Silly Picture

The Girls + Brian

Sisters!

Summit is WAY too close

2008-04-03T23:33:00.002-05:00

So tonight we didn't do too much during practice. We started out practicing handoffs-nothing special there except that because I've been sick the past few days I still can't breathe properly so every few laps I would have to run into the bathroom coughing and choking, spitting up (or trying to spit up) all the nasty stuff that has settled in my lungs and windpipe and makes it difficult for me to breathe. I thought the lack of air was actually going to cause me to throw up at one point...

After which we practiced team basketball. Oh. My. Gosh. The first couple tries sucked SO bad, and unfortunately we didn't improve too much after that and you could tell that Marcelo was getting SO frustrated. That frustration went into his passes...they were so fast and hard, which was good, unfortunately they weren't accurate so...yeah. We need to practice that a lot more. A LOT more.

Quiz things are looking pretty good, I think we're close to having everything covered...

I scared myself tonight while playing ultimate frisbee because I stepped in a hole, twisted my ankle and fell down. Luckily I'm pretty positive that the only reason it hurt was because of the initial impact, not because I actually hurt anything. My ankle feels fine now. Although when Brian and Rose had to carry me to the bench I was thinking "Summit...three weeks away...senior year..."

The greatest love story. This is MY love story.

2008-03-23T22:55:00.003-05:00

I have fallen in love with my Savior all over again...

So today my pastor's sermon was not your typical Easter Sunday gospel presentation sermon like I thought it would be. Instead, Pastor Cassidy talked about what went on on Good Friday (mainly) as well as a few other times in Jesus' life, and gave a whole different take on it. I was so glad, because it ended up being EXACTLY what I needed. The entire time I felt like he was talking directly to me.

The summary of his message was simply that, as it says in Hebrews, we do not have a high priest who is unable to sympathize with us. Sometimes we find ourselves in situations that seem humiliating or painful, and we can't really see why God would have us go through them. We as humans need to be able to have someone who can sympathize with what we're going through, or else we will only feel alone and isolated. This also goes for our relationship with God. If we are going through something we feel that God can't relate to, we feel isolated from God. But oftentimes, when we go through something painful and/or humiliating that we believe God can't relate to, it's actually just the opposite. It is these situations that let us relate to how Christ felt when he was stripped naked, beaten, mocked and shamed, hung on a cross to be exposed to all, and while he was exposed and vulnerable, beaten and shamed, he took upon all the filthy, disgusting burden of our sin. God will let us experience pain, humiliation, and shame, sometimes for no other reason that to give us the ability to relate to how Jesus felt on Good Friday. And when we can relate to Jesus on Friday, then it's possible to relate to Jesus in His resurrection on Sunday, and be free of our sin and serve God with reckless abandonment.

And while I was listening, I finally got it. I finally understood. God isn't letting me go through this painful situation for no reason, nor is He trying to punish me for anything...God is simply letting me experience what He felt when He went through the EXACT SAME THING I'm going through right now. Why is caring so painful? Well, if caring is painful for ME, how much more did it hurt my Savior when He cared for the whole world, a world that rejected Him?? While I simply pray and fight a spiritual battle for a few people, Jesus took on the sins of the world because He cared. By going through this, I get to experience, even in just a smaller amount, what Jesus went through for me on the cross.

All of a sudden, going through this is not longer a trial...it is a BEAUTIFUL PRIVILEGE!!!! Oh, that God would let me experience the same thing He experienced for me...Oh, it's simply too wonderful for words!

What could be more beautiful than to rest in the arms of a Savior who understands? What could be more amazing then to get to experience a little bit of what my Savior went through? What could be more romantic then to get to experience a little bit of the heart of Jesus? What could be more of an honor than to get to serve the risen LORD who endured what I'm going through, a thousand times over, for me?

OUCH!!!!

2008-03-22T22:32:00.004-05:00

I realized today that if I am going to continue caring for this person, I'm in it for the long haul. This isn't going to be resolved in a matter of a few days.

Fighting this battle is so difficult. Today I got in my car and felt something (probably God) tell me not to turn the radio on like I usually do. So I didn't. And in the silence of the car I started to pray...or more accurately, I started to try to pray, but I felt like everything I tried to say just bounced off the walls of the car. So finally I just sat there silent. BIG MISTAKE. Oh my gosh...God is present in silence, but Satan also knows how to take advantage of it as well. Right there in the car, I swear demons were whispering straight into my ears: "It's not worth it" "It'll only hurt you" "Caring won't do anything", etc...I almost started bawling right there in the car. Thank God I didn't or I probably would have gotten in a wreck.

Some people are really uncomfortable discussing spiritual warfare. Well guess what, IT EXISTS AND WE STILL ENCOUNTER IT TODAY.

I figured out today that I can avoid this entire situation by surrounding myself with noise. By drowning out the voices of the spiritual beings trying to talk to me. But by doing that, I also cut off my ability to pray. It's a lose-lose situation.

And then, something else happened tonight, and I felt like I was stabbed in the back with a knife...and in a matter of five seconds, I found myself going from determined to stick this out to wanting to quit right then and there. Even now, I still want to quit. But I can't.

I read over my posts from the last few days and realized that it sounds like I'm a martyr of some sort...while I don't want to give that impression, dealing with this situation is incredibly difficult.

A poem

2008-03-22T01:24:00.002-05:00

I've said before that writing helps me to think more clearly, and helps me to handle my emotions. If that is the case here, I must have an infinite amount of emotions to deal with. I think everything I've written the past few days has had something to do with caring, and this poem is no exception.

Why does it hurt so much to care?
When the pain and sorrow's too much to bear.
When your blood's pouring out like a moving stream
And all you want to do is scream

A cord connects the two of you
And what happens to him affects you too
If you were to dare severe the tie
You know that you would surely die

For the only way to possibly be free
Is to give up and live in apathy
Such a life is not worthy to live
Your soul to the devil you'd rather give

So instead you lie awake at night
Praying and crying and fighting the fight
Calling out to God with your voice
That caring like this was not your choice

For the choice to care for this person, and love
Was made not by you, but by the Father above
You've been given a mission, a mission to stay
RIght by the side of this person and pray

This mission, to you, why has it been given?
A life full of Christ you haven't been living
You're not worthy to bring your own cares to the throne
Much less fight a battle that isn't your own

But care for this person you truly do
So you will continue to fight 'til the battle is through
You will not give up 'til the battle is won
But you know that as soon as it is all done

That you will have given everything
Your blood, your tears, offering
All that you are, everything you cherish
For to win this battle, you must perish

And as you lay down and take your last breath
And give yourself up to certain death
Trust that God will give you new life in the end
And an angel to hold you, He will send

God, how much longer shall this last?
How long until this all has past?
A matter of days, or weeks, or years?
How much longer shall I shed these tears?

I will fight this battle with all that I am
By this person I continue to stand
No matter how long, I'll take all the pain
Knowing for someone it will result in gain

Why does it hurt so much to care?
When the pain and sorrows too much to bear
When the last drop of blood falls to the floor
God will have the victory forevermore

Still caring, still struggling

2008-03-21T00:44:00.002-05:00

Our team has been having a lot of struggles lately. I won't go into all the details (although if you've been following all the blogs you probably have a decently good idea), but the main problem has been lack of respect among the teammates. This is something that I have noticed for a long time (in case you couldn't tell from my blog), but pretty much the only thing I was doing about that was posting my frustrations on here-and for the most part, only three members of the team were reading this. I am ashamed to say, I wasn't handling what I was seeing in a Christlike manner. A Christlike response would have been to confront the specific people when specific instances happened, and if that didn't change anything then to go to Everett and/or Altobelli. This is not at all what I did.

Instead, I got super-frustrated when several instances of disrespect piled on top of eachother, and made it public on facebook that I was super angry with some people who were disrespecting Marcelo. Although it wasn't the best idea in hindsight, I'm actually glad I did it because Brian (Marcelo's best friend) asked me what was up, and I told him. I am so very thankful that happened because Brian not only saw everything that I saw (including instances of disrespect that I was too chicken to point out), but also confronted the people about it, like I should have done. Unfortunately, this brought to light some more problems.

It was at this point that I started struggling with the "to care or not to care" question, because the problems brought to light involved someone I really cared about. As long as the problems continue to be unresolved, I continue to feel a horrible pain in my soul. That's why I wrote the last post about caring.

But thank God Brian was willing to follow Biblical principles. He brought the issue up to the entire Summit team tonight, and now everything is finally out in the open. I am so thankful for this...I feel like I can breathe now. I'm still struggling with the whole caring, pain, "ET" feeling, because everything's not fully, completely resolved...but then again, not everything is going to be resolved in ten minutes. But the important thing is, everything is now out in the open. I'm feeling a greater level of freedom with the team now than I ever have before.

The past 48 hours have felt like a spiritual war within my soul. It felt like someone had taken the cord that connected me and the person that God apparently decided I was to care for, and started messing around with it. This may sound odd but just bear with me. At first it felt like they were pulling hard on it, like they were trying to tear my heart out...that's the part where caring HURT SO BAD...and then other times it was like they were holding a pair of scissors to the cord, threatening to cut it off...I struggled so much with whether caring was worth it, but each time I found myself slipping towards apathy it scared me so bad because I could tell what would happen if I dared to disconnect myself...it was as if that cord was my lifeline. If I cut the cord, I died. I knew if I dared to let myself become apathetic, I would never be able to truly care for anyone again.

This spiritual warfare has manifested itself in my physical body. I felt sick today, felt pretty weak throughout games practice (almost blacked out at one point), and when we went to Chili's afterwards, I reached out to pick up my glass of water and almost dropped it because my hand was shaking. Even now I have a "shakey" feeling in my gut...that's the best way I can think to describe it.

This spiritual battle isn't over yet. As I've said before, God, in His perfect wisdom, has given me that ability to know when I'm having an emotional problem versus a spiritual attack, and even right now as I'm typing this I can still feel the spiritual attack in my soul. Everything may be out in the open now but we still have to see where we go from here in the next few weeks. I'm still struggling with not becoming apathetic, and I honestly think that I may continue to struggle with that until Summit is over.

Caring still hurts. I still haven't stopped bleeding. But I know that God is going to take care of me. He will supply my spiritual lifeblood when I finally run out. And even now, as I'm going through this, God has supplied me with an awesome group of friends who have supported me in so many ways and continue to support me...Brian, Amanda, Rachel, etc. I don't know what I would do without them.

(And as a side note...our games suck. Really, really bad. Practices are going to be incredibly intense between now and Summit.)

Thoughts on caring

2008-03-19T21:44:00.003-05:00

I never thought it would be possible to reach this point. What do you do when caring hurts so much that continuing to care just isn't a possibility, if you continue to care you might die. At the same time, not caring is impossible. You were CALLED to care, and you couldn't stop even if you wanted to more than anything.

A lot of things have been happening in relation to Summit lately in both quiz and games, and it has gotten me thinking a LOT about several things: leadership, loving, my character faults, and, this is the big one, CARING. Here are some of my thoughts on all the stuff I have been thinking about (I apologize for the stream-of-consciousness of this post).

The world has it wrong. We think that we can't control who we love, but we pick who we care for. Over the past two days, I have become more than convinced that the world has it backwards. I used to think that we chose both whom we loved and whom we care for, but now I am thoroughly convinced that while we can chose whom we love (God commands us to love all but we often pick and choose whom we love), we don't really have a choice in whom we care for. Why do I believe this? Because over the past few days, I have found myself caring for people in situations where, quite frankly, it would be so much easier just to quit caring for them. But I can't. It's literally impossible. I wrote a letter to God about one of the situations today, I'm going to bare my heart out here and let y'all read some of what I wrote:

But my inner core, my very being, who I am, cannot and will not turn my back. I feel like there is something connecting us...God, why does it have to be this way? Why do I have to care so?...Please, God, I ask you to intervene. I am ready to die emotionally. I know that the only way I can't care is by not caring about anyone else.

We choose whom we love, but God chooses whom we care for. Ever seen the movie ET? Remember how Elliot and ET were connected, and whenever something happened to one the other was affected? That's how I feel right now. In all honesty, if I could choose, I would quit caring. As far as I can tell, caring isn't doing anything except putting me in a position where I can't possibly win. I wouldn't choose to care if I had the choice. But I don't have a choice. I have to care, and IT HURTS. I really think that I'm going to have to die, emotionally and maybe even spiritually, within the next few days. I can't care. Caring hurts too much. But it's as if there's something connecting my heart to the person that God has me caring for, and if I could somehow find a way not to care, I think I would die. I don't think I would have the ability to ever care for anybody ever again.

There's a song playing on the radio called "Bleeding Love". The lyrics to the chorus say "They cut me open, and I keep bleeding love." I feel that I've been cut open, and my heart is now exposed for anyone and everyone who wants to see it. In the one situation, I basically took the knife and cut myself open, but in the other situation I feel like I just got burned. But now that my heart is on display, I am thoroughly surprised at what I see.

Understand, I am not a compassionate person by nature. I expected that through these situations God was forcing me to bleed so that all my character faults could be exposed and bled out of me. After all, isn't that what God is usually up to when he makes someone bleed?

Apparently, that's not God's plan this time. One of my best friends, a pastor, has told me several times that if you want someone else to bleed, you have to hemorrhage. I think that's what God is doing here. As God has let me bleed, and as my heart has been exposed, all I have found is strings connecting my heart to the other people on my team. Why is God exposing these strings? I can't cut them. Apparently, God is letting me hemorrhage because someone else needs to bleed. Who? I'm not really sure.

What is God's plan? Why is God leaving me here to bleed and die? WHY???

I'm trying to think of Biblical characters who God let bleed for the sake of someone else, and the only person I can come up with is Christ. And now I am positive I've missed something. Surely there is a character fault God is trying to expose and get rid of!!!

Right now, all I'm hoping is that God shows me His plan. Because as far as I can tell, I am bleeding...I am dying, emotionally...with absolutely no end in sight.

Sigh

2008-03-18T21:23:00.001-05:00

I'm pretty sure I just screwed up. Yet again.

Pressure

2008-03-18T11:42:00.002-05:00

I haven't updated in a while...pretty much because there is not much to say. There will probably be a lot more to say soon because spring break is now over, but for now, all I have to say is this:

I feel pressured on every side. I feel like I have more on my plate then I can handle on my own. I think part of it is that there is also I high level in stress in other areas of my life, but for some reason, I only feel the stress when it comes to Summit. Why is this? I don't know.

Now, when it comes to Summit, I've found myself in a weird position then I never thought I would be in. I figured my position in Summit would be that of the quiz leader and not much more. As the year I have found myself functioning as much more than that. I'm not going to go into details but basically I feel that over this year I have functioned as the quiz leader, the girls' game leader (on occasion), the spiritual leader, and the peacemaker of the team. I am not complaining about this in any way...but now that we are moving into the final stretch of preparation before Summit I suddenly feel all this pressure building up.

But I'm trusting in God to lead me through this, and when I can't take it anymore I know he will pick me up and carry me through.

And my last post is still as true now as it ever was.

I just read the following quote...

2008-03-04T21:29:00.003-06:00

"Don't follow in my footsteps. I run into walls."

That pretty much sums up how I feel about my leadership as a senior this year.

God is good...

2008-03-02T14:58:00.002-06:00

...ALL THE TIME!!!

So an explanation of my last post: Altobelli put me in charge of quiz this year, which basically meant I got to control everything related to quiz (well not necessarily control, but you get the point), including who was on what team. This seemed pretty easy at the beginning of the year, but as the year continued on I made several mistakes. I never actually noticed them when I made them...but all of a sudden one day I find myself in a HUGE mess with quiz. I really, truly, honestly did not see it coming at all. God and I spent some time reviewing my performance with being the quiz captain...and God showed me several mistakes I made that added up. I started to panic, I honestly did not know what to do to get out of the situation I had created without messing up some of my relationships with other quizzers...so finally, I swallowed my pride and e-mailed everyone a looooong e-mail that I had typed up about all the mistakes I had made, where we are now and several possibilities for getting out of here. Thank God, everyone has responded positively and now everything is out in the open. As of right now, it looks like I'm actually going to get out of this mess with minimal relational damage, which is more than I could have asked for. I also spent over an hour on the phone with Rachel talking about it. We have no clue where we'll end up but we're just waiting, praying, and discussing.

Oh. My. Word.

2008-02-29T21:44:00.001-06:00

How did I end up at this point????

I am in soooooo much trouble...

And I'm under spiritual attack once again...

PRAY FOR ME I need sooooo much help...

I have once again shown my imperfections too clearly

2008-02-28T23:05:00.003-06:00

Wow, a lot can happen in the space of an hour...

I've reread my latest post several times and have gone from being frustrated and angry to sad and on the verge of tears...

While I still believe the general message of my latest post 100%, I realized that it is totally devoid of the love of Christ. For that, I apologize.

God also used a friend of mine to remind me who we are really doing this for. Jesus. If we're not doing it for Him, it doesn't matter. I was so frustrated with other people that I totally lost focus of this point.

I'm pretty sure this person knows who they are. If you're reading this, thank you from the bottom of my heart. And thanks to God for putting you in my life!

A Couple Frustrations

2008-02-28T22:03:00.003-06:00

So today's game practice was awful.

Why? You would think that going off of our victory Saturday that we would all be pumped and doing really well...nope. Not at all.

I am not even going to go into the details. I know I don't really have a place to be frustrated with everyone else because I haven't been exercising this week, but I really truly have been sick all week and have a legitimate excuse. It was obvious that others haven't been exercising either, but I doubt they have an excuse.

BUT that is the least of my worries. Marcelo and I talked a little bit tonight and we both have some of the same frustrations. I don't know who on the Summit team actually reads this beyond Amanda and Marcelo, and they're not the ones having problems with this, but in case anyone else actually does read this I'm posting this hear for everybody to see. If it continues to be a problem I may just send this out as an e-mail to make sure everybody gets it.

1. QUIT DISRESPECTING MARCELO!!!!!!!

I don't think words can describe just how angry I am at some of the people on my team for this. Marcelo is your leader and, as much as you may not like it, does have some authority over you. In fact, in the area of games, he pretty much has all authority over you. I don't care if he is your equal in any other area of life. In the area of games, you are not to treat him like he's your equal. You're to treat him as though he is in a higher position that you...BECAUSE HE IS!!!

Look, if anyone knows what it's like to be frustrated because someone you feel is your equal and doesn't deserve to have authority over you does have authority to you, and you feel like you shouldn't have to listen to them, it's me. Trust me on this one, I know what it's like. But that DOES NOT give you any reason whatsoever to not respect him, or even worse, disrespect him. The Bible does NOT say to respect authority unless they should be your equal, or unless you don't agree with everything they do, or unless [insert you're frustration here]. It just says to respect those in authority. PERIOD.

And one other thing you may not have thought of: Altobelli put Marcelo in that position. By disrespecting Marcelo, you are automatically disrespecting Altobelli.

Stop. Read that last sentence again. It is 100% true.

So quit being arrogant jerks and give Marcelo the respect he deserves.

DO NOT talk back to him.

DO NOT act like you're listening, then ignore him.

If he tells you to do something, DO IT. If it doesn't work then you can have a calm discussion with him about it. But don't just ignore him and not do it.

And let me set the record straight here: If you think in any way, shape, or form that Marcelo has not been a good leader this year, you are wrong. Dead wrong. Again and again I have seen Marcelo be willing to put aside his personal preferences and opinions and focus, objectively, on what is best for the team. Not best for him, and not best for you. Best for the TEAM. And that leads me to my second point:

1. Act like you're a part of the team already!

Okay, seriously. This should be self-explanatory. People need to quit thinking of themselves as individuals and what THEY want. Especially the seniors. Look, I know how you feel in knowing that this is your last year and wanting things the way you want them. But guess what? We have an entire team to think about. Oh, and when the rest of your team is doing some sort of work, get off your lazy butt and do the work with them.

Seriously, people. Is respecting Marcelo and acting like a unit of a team really that hard?

And you don't want to see me if I see you disrespecting Marcelo again. Trust me.

A couple hilarious videos

2008-02-25T12:03:00.004-06:00

Our family camera had gone missing for awhile and I just found it today. Going through the pics and videos on it I found some hilarious stuff.

When I had my 18th birthday sleepover, several of us did all of our "Everett Exercises" together the next morning. Shawna took a couple videos of us doing the exercises-one of the last 30 seconds of our arm circles, and one of the calf raises.

EDIT: Okay I can't get the second video to upload for anything so I guess you'll just have to wait until I figure out what's going on...

Locals/Regionals Part 2-Games

2008-02-24T17:39:00.002-06:00

After quiz was games. I really truly thought that we might not beat Manchaca this year, but to my great surprise Manchaca wasn't that great this year. I wonder why? But that didn't keep us from getting nervous at many points during the day.

First round: We win girls basketball, boys win but apparently DQed (I still question that line judge's call), and won team. Then went and dominated sprint relay. Rose and I did alright on three legged race but could have been much better. Part of the problem is that we were not at all used to a wooden gym floor (we practice on carpet). When we rounded the pin we went to dive but our feet slid out from under us and instead of diving we fell to the floor. If we had dove properly we could have possibly gotten first. Oh well. Jeff and Brian went out and did well but the floor also got them. The slipped and their knees touched the ground, although they immediately pushed back up and kept going, the line judge pulled them out. We didn't argue it but I felt it was unfair. Once again, oh well.

At this point I don't know what order the events are in, because LSA does the order of events differently from Summit. I think tug was next. Girls won, whoop! Guys won, double whoop! Andy scared the crap out of me when he reached for the beanbag, fell on the floor, used his hand to move himself just a little bit closer and grabbed the beanbag. Not only that, but he went ahead and did it the exact same way the next two rounds. Don't do that Andy. Just don't. Win some other way and don't scare us. Next was beanbag bonanza? Girls won, and guys would have won except Brian slipped and knocked over the center pin too early thanks, once again, to the wood floor. Sprint race, Rose got second place, Jeff got second place. Both of them are incredibly fast people but you could tell they were both running slower than usual thanks to the floor! Agility, Rose won and Arielle DQ'ed. Brian won, Marcelo DQ'ed. I honestly don't know if the floor was to blame for those two incidents-both Arielle and Marcelo seemed to be cutting the corners really close. Which, in all honesty, they don't have to
They're fast enough to win with wider turns. Marathon race, Arielle knocked a pin down and DQ'ed (which I'm pretty sure was due to her running a tight circle), and Ben surprised me and won! Marathon medley, we won. I run the first lap on that and I also ran much slower than I wanted to just so I wouldn't slip and fall. Balloon relay, oh good night. Apparently someone let the balloon go way to far "out of bounds" which is NOT a rule and is unenforceable. If they hadn't stopped us for that we would have won. Boys also would have won except apparently one of the guys stepped over the line.

All the Grace Covenant Games participants.

So then from there we go into semifinals, where we are put against both of the other teams from our church. What the heck? Well, no surprise, we win every game except for one in which we tied for first. Then we are told that we are in a four-way tie with Manchaca, Grace #3, First Baptist New Braunfels, and Manchaca. WHAT THE HECK???? What kind of scoring system are they using???

So we have to do three rounds of basketball. First round we lose because Marcelo gave Rose a bad pass and she wasn't able to return it so the basketball just sat in the middle of the floor. Jonathan managed to reach out and barely touch it and push it towards Marcelo, who grabbed it and finished. Second round, we get second, again because Rose got a bad pass from Marcelo. At this point she is crying because she is so upset and scared that the seniors will miss their last chance to win because of her messing up. We tried, really tried to explain to her that it wasn't her fault but she was just too emotionally messed up so we stuck Rachel Wohl in for her in the very last heat. We won that heat, which we had to in order to advance. Oh my gosh I kid you not I had the fastest most accurate bounce passes of my life during those heats. There was no way I was going to let my passes be slow.

Games.

So final round, we were amazing. We only lost one game and I can't even remember what that game was, probably one of the basketballs. I remember standing on the line ready to run the last marathon medley I would ever run at locals, and in my voice I could hear Daniel Clark's voice in my head saying something he had written on my facebook wall last September: "Leave it all out on the floor, because you'll never have another chance". Well I did leave it all out on the floor, and I'm glad I did. I have a big, nasty, dark, ugly bruise on my hip from balloon relay that I got because I do the last pass to Rose before she runs in for the pin, so I roll to get out of her way. It is a freakin' sweet roll but I hit my hip right into the ground. OH MY WORD it hurt SO BAD but I am glad I did it and wouldn't go back and change it for anything.

WE WON!!!!

So that was my senior year. 1ST in quiz and 1ST in games!!!!!! Although I am so happy and thankful to God because I went out of my AWANA local competition career on the best note possible, I also feel a huge void knowing that something that has been a HUGE part of my life for 15 YEARS is coming to an end. If promise that, IF GOD ALLOWS, I will be back next year to help coach our Summit team. I will only be 90 minutes away, so there is no reason I can't come down at least one weekend a month. At the very, very least, Rachel and Brian will be speed dial number 1 and 2 on my phone and I will be constantly calling them for updates on how the team is doing.

To my team: I LOVE ALL OF YOU SO MUCH!!!!!

MY SUMMIT TEAM!!!

P.S. Marcelo has some of the videos of our events at his blog, http://thefameofhisname.blogspot.com

Locals/Regionals Part 1-Quiz

2008-02-23T21:02:00.009-06:00

So today was the Lone Star Awana regional Journey games and quiz. It was AMAZING!!! I wasn't sure how I would be feeling all day because I woke up at 3:30 in the morning and couldn't go back to sleep, but thanks to God that didn't affect how I played today.

My team!!!!

Quiz was amazing. We really didn't think we were prepared enough, but apparently we were. We know we are not prepared enough if we want to get to Platinum at Summit but apparently the level of preparation we have put in so far was enough for locals. Brian Kersch was our coach. Mr. Seagren was the quizmaster. For those of you who don't know those two, I apologize. If you do know those two, you will understand exactly why Mr. Seagren thought that Brian couldn't possibly be the coach and told him "nice try" when Brian went to the coach's meeting! It took Brian a little bit to convince Mr. Seagren that he really, truly was the coach! I told Mr. Seagren later that indeed, not only was Brian the coach, but we chose him to be our coach. Mr. Seagren's reaction was, "You were desperate". I agree-we were desperate to have Brian as our coach because we knew that he would make a great one! And even before quiz started, he proved himself to be a great coach as he prayed over us, praying about how awesome it was to get to coach such "beautiful and intelligent" girls. Dang, way to boost our confidence!

Concentrating...

And during the actual quiz, he definitely did not disappoint us. This year speed quizzing came before multiple choice. I must say I like that a whole lot better! During speed quizzing Brian was just as in action as we were. Every time we answered a question-in fact, even when it wasn't us answering a question-Brian was looking up where to find the answer in our coach's index and following along in the book. Brian actually made me incredibly angry earlier because he said that he had forgotten the coach's index at home, when I told him several times NOT to forget it! I was SO angry, I turned around in fury and looked the other way just so I wouldn't hurt him! When I turned around, however, he was standing in front of me, coach's index in hand! BRIAN DON'T DO THAT!!!

Receiving our first place medals!!!!

Anyways, Brian definitely put that index to good use and did a fantastic job during speed. There was one question that I got "wrong" which was actually a flawed question, but Brian didn't question it, which was understandable because the question sounded perfectly legitimate and just glancing at the book, it looks like a legitimate question to ask-but when you read through several paragraphs you realize it's not a legitimate question. Of course, Brian didn't have time to read through all the paragraphs. But losing those points hardly hurt us anyways.

The team and coach from L-R: Rose, Amanda, me, Rachel, and Brian.

I was so scared at the beginning of the speed section because the very first question is a 40 point question, "Recite the verse that ends with the phrase, 'through our Lord Jesus Christ'". I buzzed in, and then TOTALLY BLANKED OUT on every single verse and could not think of which one ended with that phrase. So I sent Rachel up instead, and she couldn't come up with it either. But then again, neither could Manchaca. However, after that, we were on fire, answering questions left and right. It was SWEET! We did have a couple more wrong answers but the negative points hardly put a dent in all the points we had. There were a couple questions that were nerve-wracking but we still got. On question was "recite the lesson summaries for the first and last lessons". I'm the only one on my team who knows lesson summaries so I buzzed in, but I had already answered two...so I whispered the answer to Rachel as fast as I could (a lot of information in 10 seconds!), and she stands up and starts reciting the first summary...then blanks out on what I told her! So she totally makes up an answer on the spot based on the gist of what she remembered...and got it right! I was so proud of her! Then there was another question that I buzzed in on, and all of a sudden I could only remember three out of the four things on the list...I stood there for a loooooooong time trying to logically figure out what I was missing. First I had to think of what reference went with it, then remembered what other statement in the book also had that reference as a backup, then figure out what the fourth thing on the list was from that statement! But I did it!

The amazing team and our wonderful coach!

We also got PERFECT paddles!!! WE WON FIRST PLACE!!!!! I am so excited! I really honestly didn't think we were prepared enough but apparently we were!!!

Now, while Brian did an EXCELLENT job during speed, the same couldn't be said during multiple choice...he laid on the bleachers and almost went to sleep! His lame excuse was "y'all got perfect paddles so what's the problem?" We'll just have to make sure that he understands that that behavior will not be acceptable at Summit.

But I am so happy with how quiz went!!! What a way to end my local quizzing career, with FIRST!

All the local quizzers!!!

OH GOOD NIGHT!!!!!!

2008-02-23T19:04:00.000-06:00

So today was our local quiz and games competition!!! I wish I had time to write all about it but for now I will just mention that WE WON BOTH GAMES AND QUIZ!!!!!

Long Time No Update...

2008-02-19T10:11:00.003-06:00

So the last time I posted was about two weeks ago. In some ways, a lot has happened since then, and in other ways not much has happened. So let's see...

QUIZ: Through different circumstances, including Amanda possibly not getting to go to Summit, Rachel and I decided that it would probably be best to move Rose up to the A team and move the two girls from Virginia to the B team. Unfortunately, both the girls from Virginia are good and probably deserve to be on the A team...but if we move Rose up we have to move them down. Right now we are all praying about it and seeing where God wants us to be on this. If you would pray for us to make the right decision that would be so helpful. Rose will definitely quiz on the A team for locals, the question is what will happen at Summit.

And once again, we have decided on our outfits for quiz! We're still sticking with the black and pink dress theme.

Brian is our coach and we finally got his "Coach's Index" finished. He used it last night during quiz practice and was able to find everything incredibly fast which makes me incredibly happy.

And my team is really behind on studying the lesson material...we have verses and definitions down, Amanda has a lot of the Bible summary information down, Rachel and I both have several lists memorized, I have lesson one down pat, but for the most everything else still needs major work. I should probably be studying instead of updating y'all, especially since no one reads this anyways.

GAMES: Laura Peisker is on our team for locals, which is a plus for us because it means we actually have someone big (big in a good way, meaning she's tall and muscular) for girls tug! We have also started putting Rachel Wohl into some of the events which actually has brought some of our times down! I am so happy about that like you wouldn't believe!!! Overall, I think we are doing well, but unfortunately well doesn't automatically translate into great. Basically, I think we'll do fine in locals, maybe even win for the third straight year, but I don't think we're anywhere near good enough for Summit.

OTHER: We finally went and bought our games pants. They're silver/gray with blue stripes and black insets. Unfortunately they only had them in the men's and kid's sections, and most of us girls couldn't fit into the men's so we have to wear children's style pants which look ridiculous on us. But, as Brian says, we're not at Summit to get dates.

There's probably a whole lot more I should have updated y'all on but that's the general gist of what's going on right now. I should go study for quiz...

SOMETHING HAS GOT TO GIVE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

2008-02-05T00:21:00.001-06:00

I am so frustrated with Summit at this point, I don't even know where to begin. Let's begin with quiz.

Quiz. I have put so much effort into quiz every year since 4th grade. I absolutely love quiz, but I have no motivation to study this year. I am suffering from HORRIBLE senioritis. I've already won first place at locals, I've already gotten to platinum round at Summit. The only other person who is as passionate about quiz as I am (Rachel) is also suffering from early onset senioritis, and for some reason is not motivated to study either. DANIEL CLARK AMBER BARNETT WHERE ARE Y'ALL I need you guys so bad, the lack of motivation and passion for quiz is just awful this year...

One happy note: I finally convinced Brian Kersch to be our quiz coach this year. I am SO happy about that. Oh, make that two happy notes. We finally figured out our quiz outfits. We're going with a black-and-pink theme, and we're all wearing one-piece, semi-formal knee-length dresses.

Games. Oh my gosh, where to start. Games for our girls team are HORRIBLE. No, horrible doesn't seem to describe it. Games is the one thing about Summit that I never really put much effort into. So this year, while I slacked off on quiz, I put countless hours into games. Between Thursdays, Mondays,and working out at home, a good chunk of my life has been dedicated to games. And I kid you not, our girls team has not improved our times since the beginning of this year. We have been stagnant ever since day one. WHAT IS WRONG WITH US??? We are at the breaking point. Or, at least, all the upperclassmen girls are. Games practice tonight was awful. Arielle got really frusterated, disappeared into the bathroom, and didn't come out until over half an hour later. When Arielle does that, you know something's wrong. I'm not sure if the underclassmen girls have picked up on how frustrating things are right now...none of them have been to Summit before. But with how frustrated Arielle, Rachel, and I are right now, it's not long until they follow our lead. I am incredibly frustrated to have dedicated so much time and effort to games only to do WORSE than we have the past two years...Rachel and I spent a long time talking about it tonight, and we agreed that something's gotta give, or else we'll just end up going nowhere, except crashing and burning...

There was ONE single glimmer of hope tonight: Arielle and I did the three legged race and found out we are pretty good together.

Other than that, games are more than awful.

Additions to Marcelo's latest post

2008-02-01T16:20:00.000-06:00

*You should be putting in just as much effort into practicing as you would if you were in the real game. Not putting out as much effort because it's "just practice" is one of the sorriest and lamest excuses. Let us see what we will see in the actual games.

*(The one exception is if you know you have a potential for injury, don't push yourself too hard and don't try anything too dangerous, i.e. Rachel Barnett)

*If you are going to miss any games practice for any reason, make sure you let Everett/Marcelo/Arielle/myself/SOMEONE know. Don't leave us hanging, wondering where in the world you are.

*Pretty much the only people on the team who are not replaceable are Marcelo, Brian, and Arielle. Everyone else can and will be replaced if necessary, so show us that you deserve to be on this team. (Don't think that because you've paid $400 you're safe. We can easily stick you in two games in the first round and not let you play after that.)

*Refer to the post I wrote when I was furious, specifically the point about Marcelo being the hardest worker.

Not much to say

2008-02-01T11:50:00.000-06:00

Games practice didn't go all that well yesterday (at least in my opinion). Basketball was slow and inaccurate (at least on the girl's side), our balloon was slow (I think we broke 14 seconds once or twice), and handoffs need work. Oh well. Hopefully it was just one bad practice. Plus, it was a mix of Summit and local people practicing so we were practicing with people whom we weren't used to practicing with so that may have been part of the problem.

I finally got the buzzer box so we can practice speed! I'm happy.

I need to study for quiz a lot more.

Rachel, Amanda, and I still need to figure out exactly what we're wearing for quiz. The outfit I was going to wear is no longer available but I'm fine with that because Rachel has PLENTY of other absolutely beautiful outfits to choose from (and if there's nothing that fits me there I can always pull out something from my own closet.)

That is all...

Of pulled muscles, yelling, and pretty dresses

2008-01-28T23:07:00.000-06:00

Today's game practice was...not good, not bad. At the very beginning of the practice, after we had run our wind sprints and we were practicing handoffs, I felt HORRIBLE. Every two laps I ran I had to go into the bathroom because I thought I was going to throw up (I didn't.) After that, I didn't feel naseaus anymore-but I did end up pulling a muscle in the back of my thigh (I'm pretty sure it's the one called the glute...). I pulled it in BASKETBALL RELAY of all the games to pull a thigh muscle in. Basically, I was in a really low lunge for the chest pass, and when I turned to face front (we were doing the accordion) I turn too fast while stretching too far. OW! I managed to go through beanbag bonanza and some of balloon okay, but when I ran to the front for balloon the fifth or sixth time, I landed too hard on my leg and it just hurt too much to practice anymore. I got some ice for it and did push-ups and sit-ups while everyone else finished working out. I can walk on it, but it hurts to do so.

I realized tonight that quiz makes me really uptight. I need to work on that. I yelled three different times at five different people. I yelled at Everett for going over and cutting into quiz time. I yelled at Mr. Altobelli for not getting the buzzer box when I had asked him to do so two hours beforehand, and I yelled at Andy, Ben, and Jonathan for not coming over to practice right away. What is wrong with me?

Quiz practice went fairly well. I have a feeling Rachel, Amanda, and I will do pretty well in locals but we still need a lot of work. Good thing is we know that between the three of us we pretty much know all of the verses and definitions so now we can just focus on the lessons.

I took Rachel home tonight and we raided her closet to decide what outfits we would wear for quiz. We decided on a pink theme, since Rachel has a ton of pink clothes. I'm wearing the outfit that Amber wore for citation ceremony last year. It's pretty fancy, but I decided that it's my senior year and we can look overly fancy if we want to. I love fancy and pretty dresses so that's what we're going with :). We're still not 100% sure what Rachel and Amanda will wear, but whatever they do I can almost garauntee we'll be the fanciest, prettiest quiz team there :D.

Now that I am calm...

2008-01-22T10:29:00.000-06:00

I can now write about last night's games practice. Physically, it was good. It was an incredible workout. I am really sore, but that's a good thing. My muscles have never been this tight, especially my abs. I am really motivated to keep on pressing forward with the exercises so that I don't lose everything that I've gained.

We practiced basketball, balloon, and tug. Basketball on the girls' side is okay but is still pretty weak. Towards the beginning Everett put me in the center and made me practice my bounce passes over and over. I didn't really like that; in my mind I was thinking You are a senior, you should be able to make a decent bounce pass by now. But in the end I was really glad he made me do that, because my bounce passes were a lot better. Girls' balloon is getting a whole lot better, but we weren't able to break 12 seconds (record is 10.something). Overall I think we are doing well, just a couple things need to be ironed out and we should be able to do 11 second with no problem. Tug was pretty good too...

At the very beginning of the year, I told Altobelli that Summit just isn't Summit without drama. That Summit is a journey, something that causes you to grow in your spiritual walk. I was wondering at what point this year we'd start really seeing the drama. Well, last night definitely had some drama in it. We were practicing team basketball relay. It wasn't horrible, but I wouldn't describe it as good either. Part of it was that, for some reason, almost everyone was having a difficult time either throwing accurate passes, or throwing strong passes. I know my passes in particular were horrible, because when we've practiced basketball in the past, I was number 3. Now I'm number 5, and I have to get used to moving over before I ever recieve my pass, which is something I'm not used to doing. But overall, quality of the passes was low. And as hard as Marcelo was trying, he was honestly just tired. Now, for being tired, he was doing really well. But because he was tired, he wasn't able to consistently correct the bad passes that were given to him, which oftentimes translated into a bad pass to the next person. It wasn't his fault, it was a result of the entire team being tired and out of it. You could tell Marcelo was getting a little frusterated; at one point, he said something about how bad our passes were.

This is where things got really interesting.

As soon as Marcelo said that, a person who will remain Anonymous (we'll call this person Anon for short) said, "Well, it would help if you gave us better passes."

For just a split second, it was dead silent in the room. No one could believe that Anon actually said that. Everyone else knew that it was not Marcelo's passes that were bad, and we couldn't believe that Anon had actually put the blame on Marcelo. Marcelo was not happy about this at all. You could see frustration and anger flash in his eyes, and he threw the ball as hard as he could right for Anon's head. At this point, I became furious at both of them and yelled, "STOP IT" as loud as I could-but as soon as I did, I knew that I shouldn't have. Emotions were already high in the room, and my screams only added to the tension. It was not a godly reaction in any way, shape or form, and I knew it.

At this point, Everett instructed Marcelo to go to the restroom and cool off. I headed into the restroom as well, dropped to my knees, and started praying. And not just for Marcelo and Anon, either. My prayer went all over the place. I started about by praying for cool heads, then started asking for forgiveness for my reaction, then started praying for strength for Marcelo, then for wisdom for Everett and Altobelli...I just started pouring out my heart to God. And I'm telling you, it felt good.

The team then gathered back together, Everett prayed for us, and then we went on for the rest of the night as if nothing had happened. But I still went home furious with Anon for the what he said to Marcelo. My main problem is not that what Anon said wasn't true-my main problem was that, even if Marcelo was giving bad passes, Anon was incredibly disrespectful in the way that he talked to Marcelo. Perhaps this gives you some clarity into why I wrote my last post. Nobody deserves to be talked to in that way; but Marcelo especially does not deserve it. No matter how bad his passes were (which they weren't), he was giving every ounce of energy he had into every one and deserved to be respected for that.

No one would have said that to Daniel Clark last year, and there's absolutely no reason why anyone should think it's okay to say that to Marcelo this year.

The question right now is, where does the team go from here? If we don't pull together and grow closer to eachother and to God through this experience, the team will fall apart. And it will depend on the willingness of the individual members to make sure their hearts and attitudes are in the right place. If you haven't done so already, I want you to go read Amanda's latest blog post right now. She has the right perspective on what happened, and is responding to it in a very godly manner. I hope that everyone responds the way that she has.

I am SO furious!!!

2008-01-21T23:25:00.000-06:00

I am not going to write about the games practice tonight because I am FURIOUS at what (name deleted) did to Marcelo. But let me be clear on a few things:

*Marcelo is a good leader. Of course he's not perfect, but he really is trying and I firmly believe he is doing a good job. Anyone who knew him prior to this year should know that he has matured a lot this past year, and that maturity is showing in the way he is leading the games team.

*Marcelo is the hardest worker on the games team. He always puts in at least 100%. When you think about how tired you are after going through the basketball relay ten times, stop and think about how Marcelo must feel. He's in the middle.

*Marcelo does not deserve one single ounce of the cr*p he was given tonight. I am not trying to condone Marcelo's reaction-rather, I'm trying to point out: Marcelo is the leader (and a good one at that), the hardest worker, and one of the best athletes on the games team. He deserves our respect.

*If you disrespect Marcelo, you will lose my respect really really fast. If you are on the Summit team and you are reading this, let me make it clear that I expect you to give Marcelo nothing less than the respect that he deserves.

I know I sound angry in this post, and I am. Which is why I will stop writing now and come back when I've had time to cool off.

Oh. My. Gosh.

2008-01-14T21:54:00.000-06:00

I have never been in pain like this before.

I remember very vividly the first games/workout Monday night practice we had last semester. At the end, I was in pain and sore, but I felt good.

Tonight was the first Monday night practice of the New Year. After not working out like that for over a month (swimming is a workout, which I did a lot while overseas, but it doesn't work quite the same...), I feel awful.

I am wondering if the combination of coming back to American foods+recovering from jet lag has anything to do with it. It probably does.

But there is one thing that I can't understand-my back is killing me. Has your back ever cramped up because you've sat/stood/whatever in the same position for too long? Now imagine than painful sensation, only permanent. That is how my entire back feels now. I'm able to relieve the pain a little bit by bending over and stretching my back (I'm sitting hunched over as I'm typing this), but while I was driving home my back hurt so bad that I started praying Lord, please help me...I'm getting old before my time!

Earlier today I had tried to do pilates, which I can usually do without any problems, but today when I laid down flat on the floor, the right side of my back started cramping up hard. I didn't even do that much. I dont' know what's wrong with my back, but if it doesn't start getting better soon I can only imagine how ugly things could get...

Other than minor back pain during the majority of the practice, practice still wasn't that great. I am SO out of practice it's not even funny. Pretty much the only thing I did well on was balloon. The fact that I haven't been working out for a month showed in the exercises, and my basketball relay sucked.

Quiz stuff is going well. Finals teams are set in place. They are:

Shaney
Rachel
Amanda
Marissa
Lauren

Jonathan
Andy
Rose
Ben
Adriane

And we're still looking for coaches.

I have been communicating with my team about how we are going to study and I am pretty confident that we are going to do well this year.

I am upset about quiz practice today, though-basically because it was non-existent. Only five quizzers showed up at all (which I actually wasn't too surprised about), and then only two (including myself) headed over to quiz practice, and when I sent back Amanda to round up the others, only Andy came.

This grates on my nerves like you wouldn't believe, because I specifically switched quiz practice to Monday so that people would concentrate. The two people who didn't end up showing both specifically asked to have practice moved to Monday. After tonight, I'm seriously considering moving practice back to Thursday.

Maybe I'm overreacting, but asking me to move practice to another day and then not showing focus then either is not okay with me.

But, I am not entirely innocent either. When Mr. Altobelli told me that one of the quizzers was chatting away with another person, the first thing out of my mouth was, "I don't mean to be rude, but screw ******". That was an unChristlike reaction, and in fact was very rude.

Bad back, pain, unChristlike reactions...I am in need of some serious prayer.

This has nothing to do with Summit

2008-01-11T23:35:00.000-06:00

I made a new blog that's just for my personal thoughts. If you're interested in reading it the link is http://godsaiditbest.blogspot.com

First Awana of the New Year

2008-01-10T22:40:00.000-06:00

So our flight back into Austin touched down at 3:10 this afternoon. By the time we went to our grandparents house to pick up a couple things and then got home, it was already 5. Games practice starts at 5:30. I was exhausted, didn't have a license (it expired while I was on vacation), and didn't have a car, and my dad didn't want to go early, so I skipped games practice today. Trust me, I wouldn't have been of any worth at practice anyways. When I did get to AWANA Brian gave me a hard time about missing games practice. I love that boy, he's amazing, but tonight was not the night to give me a hard time about missing games practice. I snapped at him, which I shouldn't have done (although I doubt he noticed...)

Rachel and I haven't studied for quiz all Christmas break!!! ACK!!! However, I'm still confident we can do fairly well if we put in practice consistently. We've also had some people step off and on the Summit team so we have a different pool of quizzers. I'm pretty sure I know who's on which team with the exception of Amanda. I think she deserves to be on the A team, but I don't want anyone to have to sub.

That's pretty much all...

Citation Dress!

2008-01-05T03:54:00.001-06:00

Hello to everyone from the eastern hemisphere! I am in Malaysia right now!

I finally bought my citation ceremony dress at the Petaling Street market here in Malaysia. It is really pretty, but it doesn't look anything at all like what I had in mind. It is a two-piece dress with an A-line skirt and a corset-type bodice. The bodice has a bunch of fabric flowers on the bodice, with sequins in the middle of each flower and crystals on each side of the bunch of flowers. The color is a shimmery dark pink/purple/red/silver color (the color shifts when you move), and the back laces up. Picture below.

I also bought a coordinating pink-and-silver shawl to cover my shoulders (since it's spaghetti strapped).

The dress was originally 180 RM (Malaysian unit of currency), but the lady said she would give it to me for 150 RM, and my mom convinced her to also give me the shawl for free. Since the exchange rate is approximately 1 dollar=3.25 RM, that means I got the dress and the shawl for approximately $46.15! What a great price!

Now I need to buy the accessories to go with the dress, but at least I know what I'm wearing!

HELP!!!!!

2008-01-02T02:24:00.000-06:00

I just found out that the speech and debate regional tournament (the national qualifying tournament) for my region is the EXACT SAME WEEKEND as Summit!!!! ARGH!!!! I am trying to see if Mrs. Singleton will change the date. If it does end up remaining that weekend, Jonathan and Ben Snodgrass and myself will have to miss it, which means giving up the chance to qualify to nationals.

PLEASE PRAY that the date will be changed...I can't really miss either one but I obviously can't be at both!

I am also way behind on all the quiz stuff I need to be doing...!!!!

New Day

2007-12-11T08:33:00.000-06:00

Someone was praying for me last night, because I woke up this morning and the "heavy heart" feeling was gone.

Now I have to actually get down to rearranging quiz teams. What fun.

In need of prayer

2007-12-10T22:01:00.000-06:00

So tonight was games and quiz practice. Games practice was good and fun and very productive.

But right before quiz practice McCaryn told me that she's not going to Summit, and Shannon McGorty may not be going either. SO Bible quiz teams have to be rearranged. It shouldn't be a big deal, but through quiz practice and continuing afterwards, even now, I keep having this heavy feeling in my heart. Is it possible to have a heavy heart AND be fine at the same time? Because it's not that I am upset, or sad, or angry, or anything...cause I'm not.

But I know this feeling-I've had it before. Some people would call it depression, but I don't like to call it that. In fact, it would be accurate to say that this isn't a feeling at all. This is a spiritual attack. Somehow I have the ability to KNOW distinctively the difference between emotions and a spiritual problem. And this is definitely a spiritual problem. I don't know WHY this is happening. There is absolutely no reason for it that I can see. But it's happening.

Why did the realization that teams have to be rearranged bring this on? I am a very logical person, I'm not very emotional at all. Yet, these spiritual attacks always seem to be preceded by negative emotions. But not really this time. I was OK one minute and then I wasn't the next.

I need prayer. I need my fellow brothers and sisters in Christ to lift me up in prayer. I don't know why but apparently Satan thinks I'm a threat so he's trying to tear me down. Please, please pray for me.

Quiz Teams!!

2007-12-08T18:18:00.000-06:00

So quiz teams have been decided. They are:

Shaney Lee
Rachel Barnett
Marissa Eissler
Lauren Eissler

Andy Garia
Amanda Austin
McCaryn Burgieous
Rose Altobelli

Jonathan Snodgrass
Ben Snodgrass
Shannon McGorty
Rebecca Garia

Games tryouts and quiz practice

2007-12-06T22:26:00.000-06:00

So tonight we had tryouts for the games team. I don't know what was with me tonight but I was definitely not on top of my game tonight so I didn't do as well as I could have. Part of it is that my schedule has been hectic lately and so doing my exercises has gotten put on the back burner. I realized tonight I can't allow that to happen again.

There were a lot of girls tonight that did just as well, and better, than I did, so I don't know if I made the team or not. If I did, I know it will be for one of two (or both) of the following reasons: 1) I am a senior, 2) I know basketball and balloon relay inside out.

I totally embarassed myself doing balloon relay tonight. The last time we did it I was the first person. When I was in the fourth position, I grabbed the balloon, handed it back, and tried to get behind the back line too fast and ended up landing on my butt. It was bad. But I got back up as fast as I can, and I think I actually went faster off the back line because I already had the momentum from picking myself off the floor.

I don't know whether or not I made the team, but I'm trusting for God's will to be done.

Quiz practice was sooooooooooooo much better tonight. It was only 22 minutes (although I really really tried to keep my promise that I would have them out in under 20 minutes!) We came up with different ways to memorize verses and discussed different ways to study for quiz. It was a really productive 22 minutes. We also had Marie Calendar's pies so I think that built a little bit of motivation :)

Random story that really doesn't have anything to do with Summit: Both Arielle and I were running the last laps of the sprint relay. We were pretty close (although she was ahead of me), and when we both went in for the pins we ended up running into eachother. Well, showing how strong Arielle is and how weak I am, the smaller knocked down the bigger. Her arm knocked me in the side of my neck, and for some weird reason I spun in a circle before finally falling over. Luckily I wasn't injured, but I was dizzy and a little disoriented. Arielle was so sweet, she was so worried that she had really hurt me. She and Brian helped me off the circle. My neck should be fine, but my head might be a little worse off, which isn't good for Bible quiz...:P J/K

Quiz, being a leader, and stress

2007-12-04T12:20:00.000-06:00

Apparently the only people who read these blogs are the people who write them. If that's not the case then post a comment telling me you're reading this, cause as far as I can tell only Marcelo, Amanda, and Heather read this.

Of course, even if that's the case, I'm going to continue writing, because doing so helps relieve a lot of the stress that comes with Summit. Don't get me wrong, I love Summit with all of my heart. It's not that Summit's overly stressful or anything, but just like anything else things are going to come up that are frusterating, disappointing, or otherwise stressful. Writing my thoughts help me to think clearly.

So Thursday's game practice was pretty normal...at least I don't remember anything out of the ordinary happening. The only thing that I thought was really cool was when we did tug. I was on a team with Rebecca and Rose. We held on for a reaally long time, when something happened (I don't even remember what) and Rebecca and I both slip off the rope. Rose really surprised me and held her own against the other two teams. I got up as fast as I could and started tugging really hard. Rebecca then got on, and within ten seconds we pulled our rope all the way back and grabbed the beanbag. That was really surprising. Hopefully with a lot more training we will have a really good girls tug team, even if we have pretty much all smaller girls on our team this year.

Thursday after Awana was the first quiz practice. Not everybody made it, and the people who did had a super hard time concentrating. I understand that there aren't very many people who aren't as into quiz as I am, but it really frusterates me that they can't at least be respectful to the people who do take quiz seriously, in fact they were downright rude. They kept wanting to go out and play with their friends. Now, I can understand that, but honestly it frusterates me that they would rather go play with their friends that they've been with all evening long instead of get into studying the Word of God (please no comments about how it's "Awana Book quiz" and not "Bible quiz" there's still a lot of Bible stuff to study in there). The people there voted to move the practice to Monday night instead, which I wouldn't mind except at least one person who is more serious about Bible Quiz can't make it Monday nights. I wouldn't mind moving it but I don't want to move it when doing so would penalize someone who's serious about quiz for the wishes of the people who obviously don't care all that much. It's a frusterating position to be in. I think it's been decided to move quiz practice to Mondays, but if people aren't concentrating there either I will move it back to Thursdays in a heartbeat and tell the people who don't concentrate to come back when they can be respectful to those who take quiz seriously. I know that sounds rude and harsh, and in fact it is, but it just makes me mad when the person who is serious about quiz gets penalized for the sake of those who made it obvious they don't really care.

I think I already know how the quiz teams will be split up but I don't want to announce the teams until I have at least one more practice to observe people and make sure that my first impressions were correct.

I did talk to my sister on the way home (she was one of the ones causing problems) and asked her how I can get people excited about quiz. Mr. Altobelli said he will start doing what he did last year (bringing pies and cakes from Marie Calendars) and I think that will help. She suggested doing games to help make quiz practice more fun. I told her I'd take that into consideration but I'm not creative so I don't know what games we'd play. I also thought about it and realized the reason that I love Bible quiz.

When I was a sophomore I got stuck on a team with other people who didn't care about quiz as much as I did and didn't study as much. I, caring about quiz a lot, studied my heart out and almost killed myself (not literally) trying to memorize the whole book (to which I came very close). At one point I was so frusterated about this and was ready to throw in the book and quit, when my quiz coach, Katie, sat down with me one day and encouraged me to keep studying at least the portion of the book I was supposed to be responsible for, because she saw the "concepts in the book being applied" in my life. That was seriously some of the best encouragement I've ever recieved. And I've realized that's one of the reasons I love Bible quiz, not just for the competition, but for the rich knowledge I gain. If only there were some way to get that across to the other quizzers, I don't think we would be having these problems. Pray for me in the area of Bible quiz. I need to get past my frusteration with everyone else and be a good leader despite my frusteration.

Also pray that we will find quiz coaches. We need three, and right now we don't have anyone who is really wanting to coach.

We were supposed to have games practice last night, but Grace had a big concert that required all parking spaces. I had known about this concert for awhile but didn't think about how it would conflict until Mr. Altobelli contacted me on Sunday night. Marcelo, Jonathan, Andy, and myself happened to all be together at that point, so we unanimously voted to cancel games practice since we couldn't get a new location on such short notice.

So, next games practice is next Monday. This Thursday is games tryouts.

If you actually read this...thanks for listening to my ranting.

Workout 2

2007-11-26T20:22:00.001-06:00

So tonight was the second Monday night workout. It wasn't nearly as bad as the last one. I'm not nearly as sore as I was after last week's workout. Part of it was that I left early, due to Mom telling me "make sure you leave by seven" for who knows what reason. Since we got started 15 minutes late I pushed it back to 7:15. Arielle wasn't there so it was pretty much all me trying to coach the girls, who, for some reason, were not nearly as enthusiastic this week as they were last week. (C'mon girls!) Especially when we were practicing balloon, every time I tourned around most of the girls went and collapsed on chairs. It was sad, really.

Since my sister and I had to leave early, Everett made us do ball sit-ups (where one person throws a ball to a person on the ground as they go down, then the person on the ground throws it back up as they throw it back). Everett was doing it with me, and Amanda was doing it with Shannon. All of a sudden I heard an "OW!" Immediately I knew what had happened. I turned over and sure enough, Amanda had missed Shannon's hands and the ball had hit Shannon in the head. We got some ice, and Shannon didn't feel too bad when we got home. I think she's going to be fine.

On another note, some people showed tonight that they don't know how to eat for a workout, and ended up feeling sick. In response to this problem I wrote up a mini-essay on the basics of eating for a workout. For those of you who don't know, I am a major health nut. I absolutely love studying the human body with all of my heart. I am planning on majoring in nursing, maybe nutrition. So writing this up was a fun thing for me to do :) Here it is if you have any interest in reading it:

Eating and Workouts

So a couple people felt sick tonight during the workout...the reason? Poor eating choices.

I cannot stress how important eating right is for getting the most out of a workout. If you are not eating right your body will not cooperate and you will not be able to work out your best and get as much as you can out of the workout.The following are a few things to keep in mind:

1) MAKE SURE YOU ARE HYDRATED!!!! THIS IS OF UTMOST IMPORTANCE!!! And NOT just during the workout. You must make sure you are drinking plenty of water all the time, especially the day of the workout. Drink a glass of water before coming to the workout, and if you can, drink another glass ten minutes before the workout. Sip water throughout the workout (but do not drink too much at one time). And drink another glass after the workout. STAY HYDRATED!!! Dehydration is your worst enemy!

2) Do NOT work out on a full stomach! The body is not meant to expend energy and digest at the same time. Those are two separate functions that have two separate effects on the body. Trying to do both at one time will only make your body feel sick. Your last full meal should be at least two hours before the workout.

3) Do NOT work out on an empty stomach! You will have no energy and will feel sick. Enough said. If your last full meal was breakfast, you will be in trouble.

4) Eat SMART! Loading up on a bunch of junk food will do nothing for your body. Fruits, vegetables, and whole grains are your friends.

The best thing you can do for your body is to make sure you eat a full, healthy breakfast and lunch. What I do personally is eat breakfast and lunch, eat a granola bar about an hour before practice, bring a Slim Fast shake to practice and sip it throughout the practice (along with water), and eat when I get home.Each one of you will have to determine what eating schedule is best for your body, but make sure that whatever you do HELPS your body, not HARMS it.

End of lecture.

Notice that "ow!" is included in "wow!"

2007-11-19T22:04:00.000-06:00

WOW....OW!!!!

We had our first Monday night workout tonight...I am sore and tired but actually feel a lot better now than I did before the workout.

I also found out that I am a slow, clumsy weakling. Hopefully these workouts, plus the exercises Everett gave us to do on our own, will help get rid of that.

First Summit Meeting, and other stuff

2007-11-15T23:27:00.001-06:00

So when we got to Grace today for games practice, Everett had a 10 lb. medicine ball that he was having people do basketball with. We messed around with it for five or ten minutes, then switched to practicing handoffs. After running those for awhile, we stopped and stretched. For the last half hour they practiced basketball relay. I say "they" because I had to go pick up my dad and couldn't practice for the last half hour. Oh well.

Rachel messed up her ankle during game time. We don't think it's anything serious, and hopefully it will heal quickly. Her mother is really concerned about Rachel doing games (her family doesn't have health insurance, so her mother reaallly doesn't want her getting injured). I am praying that this won't cause her mother to put her foot down and say no to Rachel doing games.

We had our first Summit meeting at Joe's Crab Shack tonight. We didn't talk about much that people didn't already know. I did get to have a long talk with Rachel about how we are going to do quiz. We figured out tonight that we actually have around 6 or 7 potential quiz coaches, and we only need 3. I'm happy about that :D I ended up leaving my Summit games shirt design there. I am not happy about that :( Hopefully someone has it.

That's pretty much all...I expected to have more to say but I guess not much of anything exciting happened tonight.

The ACTUAL quiz count

2007-11-13T16:08:00.001-06:00

So Mrs. Garia just e-mailed me the list of who is signed up for what...there are actually 10 people signed up for quiz so far, three people have not turned in applications. I think that actually works out better, because with the two girls from Virginia that makes 12, which means exactly three teams of four.

Quiz and other stuff

2007-11-13T12:00:00.001-06:00

I was in California for my great-grandmother's memorial service this weekend, so I missed AWANA on Thursday, therefore I feel out of the loop on a lot of stuff. But I did find out a lot of stuff about Summit this week, including:

*According to my Journey director, all 15 people that signed up for Summit have signed up for quiz (I still need to verify that with Mrs. Garia, though)
*Two girls from Virginia are coming to quiz with us at Summit, and possibly locals as well (unlikely but possible).
*We need quiz coaches, and unless the girls from Virginia provide us with one, all of our coaches will be newbies to Varsity quiz coaching.
*Joe's Crab Shack is Grace Covenant's official Summit restaurant :)
*Apparently, more emphasis is being put on being in shape this year than actually practicing the games.

I have also been talking with Amanda about decisions regarding Summit (you can read her blog for at least part of the story). I have started to realize what my role is in Summit this year (besides quiz captain...).

Final roster?

2007-11-06T17:55:00.001-06:00

So it looks like the roster as of last Thursday is the final roster...although we don't know that for sure that's what it's looking like. We have nine girls and six guys.

Translation: Two girls don't get to play games (most likely.)

Also, we need at least two quiz coaches for Summit...and there are none in sight.

Wisdom

2007-11-04T22:07:00.000-06:00

Pastor Cassidy's sermon today was on wisdom. As soon as he stated the topic I perked up-I've been thinking lately about how I need wisdom this year, especially being a senior and knowing that I am a role model whether I want to be or not. Here's the notes I took:

*Knowledge does not equal wisdom. Sometimes, the people who know the most about the Bible are the most arrogant and controlling. Sometimes they will even go so far as to say "God is on my side!"

*What widom is:
-The Hebrew word for wisdom carries the idea of "skill" or "craft".
-Wisdom is applying knowledge.
-Wisdom is the practice or skill or trusting who God is and what He calls us to do.

*Biblical passages:
-Joshua 1 (example of wisdom in action)
-Proverbs

*You don't have to be smart to be wise, but you do have to be willing to learn. Oftentimes, learning wisdom leaves scars on your life.

*Practice wisdom in your life through personal holiness, in your friendships, and pursuing your purpose in life.

We also talked about the importance of Bible reading in making decisions during youth group today. Coincidence? I think not.

Title

2007-11-04T17:50:00.001-06:00

It seems like everyone else who has a Summit blog has a cool reason for their title. Mine isn't nearly as cool as other people's titles but there is a purpose to the title which I am going to explain now.

The most important word in the title is the word Journey. Every time I've prepared for and gone to Summit God has taught me so many amazing things and I've grown spiritually so much. Summit to me is not an event. It is a journey. My favorite part about Summit is not the competition, it's the preparation for that competition-doing things like growing spiritually, connecting with my teammates in amazing ways, and experiencing "iron sharpening iron."

"The Final Journey" simply means that this is the last time I will experience this journey, Summit, as a participant. This is the last time I will go through "the Summit experience". This is the last time God will use this specific experience to help me grow in my Christian walk.

I am excited to see where God has me end up at the end of this final journey.

Games Practice Week 4

2007-11-02T12:19:00.000-05:00

The girls get in a lot of good practice each week. I am slightly frustrated because it is all freshman and sophomore girls except me, and they are all working on technique basics. So I don’t get in much practice of my own, I am usually coaching the other girls. Rachel gets there around 6 when I have to leave to go pick up my dad. I am OK with this for now, but I hope that within the next couple weeks more people on my level show up, and I get to get in more practice of my own.

There seemed to be a huge lack of focus on the guys’ side for reasons I do not know. When I left to go pick up my dad the guys were not practicing, and when I got back they were not practicing then either! I asked one guy standing outside why he wasn’t inside practicing, and he shrugged his shoulders and said, “There’s no one in there.” I walked inside and yes indeed, there were people in there-but they were pretty much all girls that were practicing. What’s going on with our guys? I wish I knew.

Marcelo and Arielle were talking to Everett, so maybe the fact that Marcelo wasn’t inside pushing the guys to practice had something to do with it…but I still don’t get it. Usually Jonathan is able to push the guys to practice…I don’t know. I don’t get it.

What actually happened

2007-11-01T22:01:00.000-05:00

So here's who I know for a fact either turned in their application tonight, or didn't but will get it in next week:

GIRLS
Myself (senior)
Arielle Timmons (senior)
Adriane Wass (senior)
Rachel Barnett (junior)
Amanda Austin (sophomore)
Rebecca Garia (freshman)
Rose Altobelli (freshman)
McCaryn Borgouis (freshman)
Shannon McGourdy (freshman)

GUYS
Jonathan Snodgrass (senior)
Andy Garia (senior)
Marcelo Gonzalez (senior)
Brian Kersch (senior/junior)
Jeff Fulwiler (sophomore)
Ben Snodgrass (sophomore)

I am incredibly super excited that Jeff is going-I've wanted him to be on the Summit team since the first time I saw him run this year. I don't know if Tres Maverick got his application in or not. If he did we are one girl and three guys short of two games teams. I've pretty much been opposed to the idea of two games teams from the beginning, but now that I'm actually seeing who's signing up I've decided I like the idea of two games teams better than one games team based on seniority.

On another note...Everett gave us a ton of lower body conditioning exercises to do this week. I am going to die.

Two games teams or one?

2007-11-01T11:14:00.001-05:00

So the past couple days I've been doing some thinking about who's going to be on the Summit team this year...and it looks like there might only be one games team going this year! Here's who's signed up so far:

GIRLS
Myself (senior)
Rachel Barnett (junior)
Amanda Austin (sophomore)
Rebecca Garia (freshman)
Rose Altobelli (freshman)
McCaryn Burgeious (freshman)

GUYS
Jonathan Snodgrass (senior)
Andy Garia (senior)

Marcelo Gonzalez (senior), Brian Kersch (senior...or junior, depending on how you look at it...), and Arielle Timmons (senior) are handing their applications in tonight. People that may be handing in applications tonight (but I don't know for sure) are Tres Maverick (sophomore), Matthew Boyd (senior), and Shannon McGourdy (freshman).

IF everyone I think is going to sign up does actually sign up, that gives us eight girls and six guys, fourteen people total. Assuming these are all the people that sign up, that gives us two choices: 1) Look for people from other churches (or even join with another church) to fill up two games teams, or 2) Hold tryouts to see which girls get the spots. That's assuming that everyone I think is going to sign up signs up and no one else. If we do end up with fourteen people, my guess is that it will come down to tryouts to see which girls get the spots. If we have more people, however, I think we'll try to join with other churches. We're only two girls short of enough girls for two games teams, and four guys short.

I'm spending way too much time analyzing this...I should just wait and see who turns in applications tonights.

Applications due THIS THURSDAY!!!

2007-10-30T11:17:00.000-05:00

If you are planning to go to Summit with Grace Covenant Church and you haven't turned in your application yet (which is a LOT of people, only seven people have turned in applications so far), please make note of the fact that Summit applications are due THIS THURSDAY, NOVEMBER 1ST!

E-mail from Altobelli:

- Summit Registration:

Mrs. Garia needs a registration form (attachment) and deposit from everyone who plans to attend Summit. These are due this week.

If you have a problem getting this together, now is the time to talk to me. You can email, call (699-4186) or see me on Thursday.

We have reserved both the bus and hotel rooms. Soon we will need to send our registration and payment to Awana. I want to get the early registration discount as it is significantly less $$ than normal registration. That means we need to pull these loose ends together now.

If you need an extension on this deadline please talk to Mr. Altobelli.

Otherwise, GET YOUR APPLICATIONS IN!!!!!!!!!

Summit Info is UP!

2007-10-28T23:02:00.000-05:00

Information for Summit 2008 is finally up on the 24-7 Ministries website! I am so excited!
http://www.24-7ministries.net/limits/summit/index.htm

One thing is disappointing: It looks like there is no volleyball or basketball competition this year. At all.

I would have called Altobelli with this info, but unfortunately it's too late to call him now without being totally rude...so instead I e-mailed him, Everett, Mrs. Garia, and Mr. Maverick with the info.

Games Practice Week 3

2007-10-25T23:06:00.000-05:00

So this week my sister and I got to the church around 5:15 to start practicing, because I now have to leave the church at 6:00 to pick my dad up from work and drive him to AWANA, because he had surgery on his shoulder and can't drive. I'm a little disappointed about this, because 6:00 is when the practicing seems to actually get going. So I have to miss the most productive half hour. Oh well.

When I got back to the church there were people on three color lines practicing basketball. I think I counted 18 or so(?) people practicing. I was incredibly pleased.

Marcelo can probably tell you more about it because he was there this week :)

Summit through Sunday

2007-10-23T11:56:00.000-05:00

I was looking at a calendar of 2008 recently, and noticed that the 24th-27th (the dates for Summit) were a Thurdsay-Sunday. Summit is usually a Wednesday-Saturday-they've only change the dates once, last year, which was a Saturday-Tuesday. Because of Summit being on a Sunday last year, Volleyball and Games were at the same time so that we could reserve one evening for a worship service. To make sure the dates were correct, I sent an e-mail to headquarters. It turns out that yes, the dates are correct. So for anyone who was wondering, like I was, if the dates were off, no they are not. Summit is a Thursday-Sunday this year.[=

Hi Shaney,

The dates are correct. When I am negotiating a contract with a city and venue – I try to remain flexible to get the best rates & dates. Sometimes, that means shifting to Thursday-Sunday, like last year. Hope this helps your understanding.

Blessings,

Kathleen

Now what does that mean? Will they do another Sunday service? Will volleyball and games be at the same time again?

...I'm off to e-mail headquarters to ask about that! They probably don't know as of right now is my guess, but if they do know and they tell me I will let y'all know!

UPDATE:

Just the closign session – which is one you will not want to miss. If you loved the Jesus Painter last year – don’t miss any of the main sessions.

Kathleen

I have no clue what "Jesus Painter" is-I'm guessing it's referring to the Sunday session which my team missed last year.

But now we know that there won't be an extra session to interfere with volleyball and basketball this year!

GET YOUR APPLICATIONS IN!!!!

2007-10-22T21:00:00.000-05:00

I don't know who actually reads this blog, but if you are reading this and you are planning to go to Summit with Grace Covenant, please GET YOUR APPLICATIONS IN ASAP!!! Do not waste any time! The sooner everyone's applications are in the faster we can get things rolling and everything will go more smoothly!

If you want to know why in the world I am pushing you to get your application in just read the last post and all the comments that follow, and you will understand why!

Starbucks

2007-10-20T22:35:00.000-05:00

So I went with the Altobelli's to Starbucks after CrossTrainers today, and Altobelli and I talked about different issues relating to Summit, mostly stuff having to do with transportation and games teams. It was pretty much one of those "we don't know what's going to happen but here's different possibilities and different scenarios and such..." types of conversations.

At the beginning of the year, it looked like we were going to have more than enough guys interested in Summit to have two teams, but not enough girls. Now it's turning out to be the other way around! We're still waiting to see how many people actually sign up, but right now it looks like we could be looking for people from other churches to join with us. We'll have to wait and see. It would be cool if that did happen-it gives opportunities to meet other people you might not have met otherwise.

That's pretty much all I had to say...nothing of great importance...

Games Practice Week 2

2007-10-18T22:37:00.000-05:00

So we had games practice for the second time today. Ten girls and four guys showed up, which is a lot better turnout than last week. I was very pleased-especially considering that nobody's actually announced that yes, people are getting together to practice games before club starts. I should probably ask Altobelli to e-mail that information out.

For awhile it was mostly girls-the guys didn't show up until somewhere around 5:50-ish(?). Once Jonathan Snodgrass got there he worked with the guys and I got to work with the girls, along with Rachel Barnett. We worked on basketball and balloon. I am so much faster at those events than I have ever been in the past.

Personally, I have never been overly concerned about games-quiz is more my thing. But this year, being my senior year, I really want to do well. Not just well as in do our best and glorify God, but well as in, actually get somewhere. This is my senior year, my last chance. I'd rather make the A team than be captain of the B team. If I made the B team, I would automatically be girl captain. But I honestly don't care about being captain-I'd rather make the A team.

Any other year and I wouldn't be concerned about making the B team. Freshman, sophomore, junior year...I wouldn't have cared too much. This year I do care. I really want to make the A team. If I don't make the A team this year, there's never going to be another chance. So this year I actually am really worried about whether or not I make the A team. In fact, I am much more worried than I should be. I need to quit worrying, practice so I do well, and leave the results up to God.

On another note...I absolutely hate it when I'm trying to set a good example and someone else is being a jerk and making things difficult.

My Hero

2007-10-16T22:03:00.000-05:00

In Marcelo's latest post, he mentioned a book called "Next Generation Leader" by Andy Staley. Everett gave me a copy as well, and I highly recommend it. If I had to recommend one book on leadership, THIS IS THE BOOK. Anything and everything you could have every wanted to know to be an effective leader is in this book (in addition, to the Bible, of course). I'd like to tell you about someone who did for me what Nathan did for Marcelo. I'd like to tell you about a girl who modeled everything in Next Generation Leader, and who inspired me to be a good leader.

Her name is Amber Barnett. I met her at AWANA my freshman year, when she was a sophomore. I went with her to Summit the past three years. Let me tell you, this girl has everything. If anyone has a reason to be proud, it's Amber. She literally has everything going for her. She is incredibly pretty, she is very athletic, she has brains, she's incredibly at quiz, and she's incredibly popular. Everyone loves Amber Barnett.

But what most stands out to me is her beautiful spirit. She is only seven or eight months older than me, but she is light years ahead of me spiritually. In everything she does, she always prays and seeks God's will. She has a very gentle and humble spirit. She's not afraid to be real and honest. She's also incredibly wise. When Amber speaks, people listen. Despite only being a mere five feet tall, she never has to try to be heard. People are naturally attracted to her and WANT to listen to her.

Amber took on incredible leadership roles in Summit last year. She was the quiz coach, games team captain, and the spiritual leader of the team. And she did an incredible job. She sought God's will in everything and lead the team incredibly well. She wasn't perfect, but when she messed up she was quick to humble herself and apologize. Without her, I don't know what the team would have done. She was the glue that held the team together.

One of my goals as a senior this year was to be like Amber. To be the leader of the team, and lead the way Amber did. Well we've barely gotten started with Summit and it's become clear to me that that is NEVER going to happen. I am nothing like Amber.

Amber was wise. I am foolish.

Amber was humble. I am prideful.

Amber was selfless. I am selfish.

Amber was sweet. I am anything but.

I will never be the leader Amber was. But her example gives me something to strive for. I only hope I can be half as good a leader as Amber Barnett was.

Bible Reading

2007-10-15T07:00:00.000-05:00

So this morning in my Bible reading I asked God to show me something I could apply to Summit. Specifically, I've been struggling with jealousy, anxiousness, and things not going the way I planned. I guess somehow I thought that since it's my senior year, things were going to go exactly the way I wanted them to go. Yeah right! Who am I kidding!

Anyways, I opened up my Bible and found myself in Isaiah 62. What could I possibly find in Isaiah that would apply to Summit? I thought. The answer?

Isaiah 62:7,10-I will mention the lovingkindnesses of the LORD, and the praises of the LORD, according to all that the LORD has bestowed on us, and the great goodness towards [the Grace Covenant Summit team], which He has bestowed on them according to His mercies, according to the multitude of His lovingkindness...But they rebelled and grieved His Holy Spirit; so He turned Himself against them as an enemy, and He fought against them.

Here is what God showed me through those two verses:

I will mention the lovingkindness of the LORD, and the praises of the LORD How do I keep from being jealous and anxious, and trust God instead? Talk about what God has done. Not just remember, or think about it in my head, TALK about it! How can I NOT trust God when I'm talking about all the good things He's done?

He has bestowed on them...according to the multitude of His lovingkindness The reason God does what He does is because He LOVES us and He CARES about us. He knows what He's doing and He has our best interests at heart. How can I possibly be anxious when I know how much God loves me and cares for me?

But they rebelled and grieved His Holy Spirit Just as Israel turned away from God, so can I! If I'm not careful to trust God and instead rebel against His plan and try to do my own thing, the results won't be pretty. God probably won't become my enemy and fight against me, but if I'm fighting against Him it will sure feel like He's my enemy!

Application-Now I'm going to do it. I'm going to talk about some of the great things God did last year that I thought at first were disasters.

1. At the very beginning of the year Amber Barnett (one of our best quizzers ever) told me that she had been praying about it and she believed it wasn't God's will for her to do quiz. I didn't argue with her, but inside I was going what?!? You can't be serious!! We need you! You're our best quizzer! What are we going to do without you? What a disaster, right? Wrong! As the year went on I realized that we needed a coach for quiz, and none of the adults going to Summit knew how quiz at the high school level works. So guess who ended up being our quiz coach? Yep, Amber Barnett! She was an awesome coach and I couldn't have asked for more!

2. As the year went on I realized that Altobelli, our new director, had a completely different leadership style than the leaders before him. I interpreted his let-the-students-lead style to a lack of initiative and motivation, and thought that he didn't really care about Summit all that much. Disaster, right? Wrong! Turns out I totally misinterpreted his style. It's not that he lacks initiative or motivation, it's that he wants the students to initiate, motivate, and lead. He tries not to interfere too much and let students lead for the most part. And it works well. Motivated students really do make good leaders, and when mistakes are made we know we can't blame it on the adults! Daniel and Amber made incredible leaders last year.

3. A couple weeks before we are going to Denver I find out that Arielle's older brother, some 20-something guy named Everett, is going with us as one of our adult leaders. I wasn't exactly thrilled about this. First of all, who suddenly wants a new leader involved only two weeks before competition? And second of all, I had heard his name before. At Scholarship camp he had a reputation as the "coolest" counselor. And in my mind, I knew what "cool" meant: he let teens do whatever they wanted to do and get away with it, right? Wrong! Turned out that Everett does anything BUT that! He was an awesome leader! He's back with us this year and I personally couldn't be happier.

4. Also two weeks before Summit, one of our most athletic girls, Corrine, breaks her arm while playing basketball. Now surely this is a disaster! After all, we only have two weeks before Summit. Who in the world will replace Corrine? Alex, that's who! An athletic blonde freshman from Wisconsin played for us and she was INCREDIBLE! Not only that, but she often came with us to different events at Summit and it ended up feeling like she was part of the team. Had Corrine never broke her arm, we may never had met Alex.

So now this year, we have a ton of people interested in Summit, and only so many games team slots. Limited spots on the team, plus the teams are probably going to be stacked according to athletic ability. Disaster, right? Wrong...

To be continued...

First post

2007-10-14T21:56:00.000-05:00

So I'm pretty new to this whole blogging thing, this is my first blog post ever.

For those of you reading this who don't know me, my name is Shaney Lee and I'm a senior at Grace Covenant Church in Austin, TX. I've gone to Summit every year since freshman year. Summit is one of the biggest highlights of my year. This is my last year going as a participant and I want to record what happens every step of the way.

At the beginning of the year our Journey director, Frank Altobelli, asked the seniors want they wanted to get out of this year. I said that yes, I want to win at Summit (who doesn't?), but I'd rather the emphasis be not on the competition itself, but on the journey towards Summit. Every year I've gone the richest memories I've taken away are not the memories of competition (although those are some pretty sweet memories). Rather, my richest memories are the struggles the team goes through together, the ups and the downs of the journey that we experience together, and how, in the end, we become closer to each other and closer to God. God always does amazing things through the journey to Summit, and I wanted to record that journey this year, especially since it's my senior year.

So when Marcelo suggested this website/blog, it just seemed perfect.

Already, things are not going at all the way I thought they would be! God is already pushing me out of my comfort zone. Last year our team was a small, pretty intimate team. This year, the interest in Summit has exploded! Apparently there are over 30 kids interested in Summit this year, and six leaders are planning to go. Personally, I DO NOT like big Summit teams. My freshman year was a smaller team (16 people, 4 leaders) and I liked it, sophomore year was a larger team (24 people, 10 leaders) and I STRONGLY disliked it, last year was 13 people and 3 leaders, and I LOVED it! So, needless to say, I don't like the idea of a large team. I would greatly prefer a smaller, closer team.

But, apparently that is not God's will.
So I am going to have to be flexible, humble, and trusting, and let God do His thing.

Last Thursday I decided to go to club early to practice games and invited a couple other people to come. I wasn't sure how many people would come because I only invited three people, but I knew that those three people may have invited more people. Five girls and four guys showed up. I was pleased with the turnout, considering that I only expected three or four people to show up.

But one thing that disappointed me were several people who came up to half an hour early to club who apparently are going to Summit who didn't bother to get in on the practice. I'm trying not to be judgemental, I'm sure they had legitimate reasons for not getting in...it just seemed odd to me. Hopefully in the coming weeks more people will practice.

It felt kind of weird to be the one in charge of the practice. I'm not even the girl games captain this year so it seemed especially odd. But it also felt really cool to finally turn around and teach others what I've been taught for the past three years.

I have no clue who will actually read this but whoever is, please pray for a couple things for me with Summit this year:
1) Pray that I will trust God and not get upset when things don't go the way I want them to go.

2) Pray that I will set a good, strong example as a senior.

3) Pray that I will enjoy this year and not miss out on anything God is doing.